Wednesday, 02 February 2011
This is a guest post from Just A Guy Thing.
This answer was plaguing my mind after I saw the question asked at Jalopnik. There are so many wonderful answers to this question. My area of expertise is certainly my lifetime (30 years), during which period there have been some true automotive abortions out on our roads. This shortlist is by no means exhaustive, but it's not a bad jumping-off point. If you own one of the below cars, I'm sorry. I'm sorry because you suck.
Not a handsome car. Though it is the official car of Walter White from Breaking Bad, that's probably not going to help get you laid. And if it does, you're probably with a pretty weird chick.
Chrysler PT Cruiser
Not a handsome "whip," as the kids would say. Two styles that shouldn't be married: hot rod and station wagon. Not an awesome combo. Statistically, if you own one of these, there's a 78% chance that you are a humongous dork. It's not certain, but it's pretty likely.
With the low, flat grille, I'm sure the nice folks at Dodge thought that they were putting together a very tough-looking SUV. However, this stance, coupled with the fact that the car is named after an American Gladiator, made the car seem kind of...retarded. It looks a little bit like it might have retard strength. It's weird to think of in a car, but that's what occurs to me. However, that's just in the realm of performance. In the world of aesthetics, it looks...well...retarded as well. Too bad.
Aston Martin Lagonda
It looks like someone took a picture of a Cadillac, tossed it in photoshop, smoked some Angel Dust, then tweaked the design and pushed "print." I somehow doubt that's what the design team was going for.
I don't care if it's saving the rainforest. It's a weird-looking ride. Perhaps the most utilitarian design of any car on the road today. It looks like the car of 2011, as designed by someone in 1981. With all that money you're saving on gas, at least put some flames on it or something. A longhorn skull on the front would look sharp too.