Friday, 07 January 2011
Here’s a little something for the ladies (oh yeah!). Some advice, from little old me from the swamp:
If you know you’re going to get drunk, don’t wear high heels.
Very simple. Just don’t do it. Don’t do it. You know why? Because you’re not going to be able to walk in them when you’re drunk and you’re either going to take them off and be barefoot or fall down a whole lot.
Frankly, I don’t know how you walk in them to begin with. They seem highly uncomfortable. But that’s your choice. Whatever. Just avoid them when you know you’re going to be drunk.
The only people who should be wearing high heels when they’re drunk are strippers and hookers. They’re professionals.
I work at a bar that happens to be on a street with a lot of other bars and there’s no way all the women hobbling and wobbling in their heels, walking barefoot, or piggybacking on their fella had no idea they were getting drunk.
What’s worse is that the club next door is up a giant flight of stairs so women have to try to drunkenly maneuver down the staircase in heels. This does not work very well.
And barefoot is a bad decision. Especially on event nights. Like oh say New Year’s Eve which just passed. If you go out to a bar or club on New Year’s Eve, you are getting drunk. What’s more is that several glasses are guaranteed to break at the establishment where you are getting drunk. So you’ll be drunk in a dark room filled with broken glass.
I’ve seen it happen every single event night. Just don’t do it. You can save yourself so much trouble just by not wearing heels.
I just don’t get it.
And don’t say the heels are for guys. They’re not. No guy cares about what you’re wearing, especially on your feet. You could be wearing a burlap sack and no guy will care. All guys care about is if you agree to go home with him.
Women dress up for other women. Women where heels even when they know they’re going to have to take them off just to walk home and likely cut their feet up because they want other women to say, “cute shoes” to them.
The number one denial of this is probably “Nooooooooo I do this for myself. I like to look pretty for myself.” Which is somewhat valid because it’s true in at least some of the cases and likely partially true in most, but probably about half the women who say this are somewhat lying. And even if that is the reason, I think it doesn’t say something so great about you that you’d forgo the ability to walk and/or the ability to walk around without cutting yourself on broken glass so you can feel pretty about your feet. Just sayin.
Point is, ladies, please don’t wear high heels when you know you’re going to get drunk. It’s not a pretty sight.