Sunday, 02 January 2011
Why do people love the Food Network? What makes people enjoy watching shows about DELICIOUS food that they can't smell or taste? It kind of seems like some bizarre psychology experiment, getting humans to salivate without even being near food. No matter what the reason, shows about food are awesome, and people like me and you are getting digitally obese.
Watching about restaurants you'll never eat at, chefs you'll never sample, and countries you'll never travel to is just plain American fun! But a lot of the time it can be nothing short of torture. Ever watched Iron Chef when you were starving? It is like being in prison, and the keys to your cell are on an HD TV screen. Yeah, it is that upsetting.
Ever watched Unwrapped while you were stoned? A different form of torture.
Sometimes when you travel you have the bright idea to visit a spot from your favorite food show. That is always so gratifying to FINALLY eat somewhere you've been drooling over on your couch. After all, why not go to some good place from Diner, Drive-In's and Dives when you are stuck in Cape May, NJ for 2 days.
Guy Fieri - sucks
Giatta De Laurentis - is awesome
Rachel Ray - has man hands
Bobby Flay - is seriously a high school dropout
Ina Garten - would make a nice replacement mother
Paula Dean - will give you a heart attack by age 17
Alton Brown - is a strange genius that has gotten way too skinny
Marc Summers - is forever trapped inside that 50's looking diner
Long live cooking shows! One day our grandchildren will have smell-o-vision and taste-o-vision and we'll angrily tell them to fuck off 'cause we had it hard back in the day.
Tell me about your love of cooking shows!
P.S. - Chopped is awesome and no one gives a damn about Cupcake Wars