Thursday, 15 April 2010
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10 Reasons Why Older Men Are More Appealing
Every since I started dating, I've always been interested in older men. I'm not talking 2-3 years older, although that was the case with my first partner, I'm talking 9+ years older. When I was 18, I dated a guy who was 27. At 19, I dated men between 28-36. And now, at 20, I wouldn't mind dating a man who is between 40-42. I've been asked a lot 'What's wrong wtih boys your age?' My answer: They're boys, not men.
Reason #1: Men age gracefully.
Sounds like a stupid reason, because there are plenty of guys under the age of 30 who are attractive, but their babyfaced youth isn't what makes me tick. I don't want to feel like I'm dating my brother. Why watch the guy get better with age when you can just get a guy that has already aged and looks amazing? It's kind of like cheese: Aged Gouda is much more appetizing.
Reason #2: They're, hopefully, over their game playing phase.
Let's face it: Dating is a game. The decision you have to make is whether or not you want to play Battleship or Monopoly. Guys my age are a fan of the mind games. They like to keep their options open, while still keeping you close. They expect you to be there, while older men work to keep you. Battleship is a game of destroying, while Monopoly is a long game of strategy. I'd rather keep my emotions intact and strategize my next advancement then to have all my feelings blown into little pieces.
Reason #3: Romance.
This list isn't true for all guys my age, but for the majority it fits like a glove. Older men have a way of thoughtfully putting together a romantic evening based on what their woman is interested in. Whereas, guys my age get a skewed vision of romance based on movies like American Pie and Knocked Up. Excuse me for a moment, if I'd rather have an evening tailored to my personality and interests rather than one in a packed club where we can rub our bodies against each other because you hope I'll feel your package and get turned on.
Reason #4: Maturity.
Older men are 9 times out of 10, more mature. They've had their one night stands. They've played with a girls emotions already. They've broken hearts. When that phase passes, they're left with a nurturing maturity that is beyond sexy. They no longer think of girls as disposable; they cherish them.
Reason #5: More Experience in the bedroom.
By the time a guy hits 35, he's most likely had his fair share of sexual encounters. He's no longer interested in a wham bam thank you ma'am scenerio. He now wants to worship his partner and make her feel like the luckiest woman on earth. His needs are no longer the number one thing on his mind, and if he finds the right girl it won't matter because his needs will be on her mind. A sexual experience where both partners care about the other's needs is an excellent predicament to be in.
Reason #6: Stability.
If you're over the age of 30 and still living with your parents, this reason obviously doesn't apply to you. However, most men by that time are living on their own, have a steady job and are either close to or already have their ducks in a row. You don't have to worry about constantly paying for dinner because the guy who's your age lost his job and now mooches off you instead of finding another. Granted, older men like to be taken out just as much as you do, so paying is still a pleasant thing to do, but if you can't you don't have to worry; your older guy has got you taken care of.
Reason #7: Great conversation.
I'm not saying I can't have great conversation with guys my own age, but the converation is less mind stimulating and more mind boggling. They don't appreciate the more articulate conversations involing politics, religion and world topics. If they do, then it's more of an argument and less of a conversation. You can learn a great deal about yourself, life and the world around you by conversing with an older gentleman.
Reason #8: They're protective, in a non-caveman sort of way.
Most men, regardless of age, are going to be protective of what they think is 'theirs'. The difference between younger guys and older guys is that an older guy won't act barbaric when it comes to protecting his girl. The first thought that crosses a younger guy's mind when he gets into protective mode is to bash someone's face in or break their knee caps. An older guy is less worried about beating up another person and more concerned with getting you out of that situation, whatever it may be.
Reason #9: They're less drama.
An older man no longer cares that you have guy friends. He no longer cares if you go out by yourself. He trusts you and knows that you won't stray. If you do, then it wasn't meant to be and he won't end things on a bad note. The minute a younger guy see's a text from another guy his testosterone roars through his veins.
Reason #10: Confidence, not cockiness.
It's not hard to tell confidence from cockiness. Older men are confident in themeselves. They know they make you happy. They know they satisfy you. Younger guys only think they make you happy and satisfy you. If you happen to tell a younger guy that he isn't making you happy or he isn't satisfying you he gets defensive. His actions are no longer the problem; you are. You're just broken, and it spirals down from there.
This list isn't true for all younger or older men, but in my experience it holds up.
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- From: beautifullymindfull@xanga
- Name: Chelsea
- About Me: Politically incorrect, morally insignificant, sincerely blunt.
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Comments (50)
Even an older guy can be an immature douchebag.
Why isn't this on Datingish instead of Mancouch?
Absolutely agreed. Older men are more mature and more often than not, they look for a stable long lasting relationship as opposed to younger men who mainly look to get in bed with as many woman as possible before settling down.
There are some older guys that are trying to hold on to their youth by acting like a fifteen year old. But MOST older men are great.
YESSSSS - #8 and #10 :)
i thought guys at age 30ish, starts to cheat easily....
@aznsista2envy@xanga - nah they all cheat easily lol
I seem to attract older guys. That's a little bit too much age difference for my masters though.
I think this is because I wont' go anywhere, nobody is going to steal me, I don't fight and I'm not a whale. I get newly divorced 40 year olds like nothing else. Sometimes I think that they've just never been alone before, and they are lonely and trying to use me to fill until a suitable replacement can be found.
I scare everyone away on purpose these days.
I just don't want to deal with it.
@Manstration@xanga - That's true. The media has proven that.
This list is true for some, not all but the good few will appreciate this list!
I enjoyed reading this because I can relate. :)
Reason #1: Men age gracefully.
My boyfriend is gorgeous. I'm not the only one who thinks so. And I totally have faith - I've seen his male gene pool - that he'll sustain his good looks.
Reason #2: They're, hopefully, over their game playing phase.
He was never into the game playing phase, so stop generalizing all men. Perhaps you've just had shitty relationships with guys your own age. Hey, to each her own.
Reason #3: Romance.
I definitely get plenty of this.
Reason #4: Maturity.
...And this. He's the stability to my frazzled; the voice of reason when I'm going crazy; he'll shake his head and smile when I make a bad joke; he's intelligent when it comes to finances and short AND long term goals; and so much more.
Reason #5: More Experience in the bedroom.
Yeah, I have ZERO complaints. Believe you me.
Reason #6: Stability.
We're just under 19 and we already have a stable, happy relationship after 7 months. I've battled with other guys my age for years and never got that. So no, not all guys around this age are immature and unstable. It just took time for me to find one that is doing his best and has a good head on his shoulders.
Reason #7: Great conversation.
We talk about everything and have great communication. We make one another laugh, and really think about whether we're on the right track.
Reason #8: They're protective, in a non-caveman sort of way.
I love that he's overprotective of me. Since I lost my mom, I haven't had anyone "watch over" me the way my babe does. My family's not really there, nor are my girl friends, definitely not in that way.
Reason #9: They're less drama.
Guys in general don't strike me as very dramatic... it's the girls you tend to have to watch out for. Of course, you can't generalize, but from MY experience... this is totally true.
Reason #10: Confidence, not cockiness.
He's got plenty. You could say my boyfriend had to grow up quite fast, in many aspects. That's why he's so stable, mature, totally honest, and past the bullshit of any type of drama.
Just a breakdown of my own relationship. Sup.
I suppose most of it's true. I've never really put much thought into it, though my friends are always giving me confused looks when I'd rather be talking to a man in his late 20's/early 30's over a frat guy my age.
I don't know. I'm 20 as well, not a child anymore, and I'm seriously just not attracted to guys my age. But over 40? That's a bit of a stretch for me. They'd have to be pretty damn special.
you have a list of good reasons, but can u list a list of good reasons for older man to choose young girls?
The one part I was puzzled with was this:
"He trusts you and knows that you won't stray. If you do, then it wasn't meant to be and he won't end things on a bad note."
First of all, I think you're being a little too easy on yourself. I don't think "it wasn't meant to be" is ever a suitable excuse for cheating, and if you think it is you're not mature enough to date someone 9+ years your senior. Second of all, cut the boys some slack! Wouldn't you be pissed if you found out you just got cheated on by a girl who rationalizes cheating with "it just wasn't meant to be"? I wouldn't blame anyone for ending a relationship like that on a bad note.
However, don't take that personally. I loved this article and I love older men, so it's nice to see a younger girl who agrees with me. :]
@hitomineko@xanga - lol
I like this comment
Yeah, I like older guys too, but not so much older.
...So correspondingly, a 12-year-old should go after 18-21 (or vice versa)?
It isn't pedophilia, it's personal preference! :D
@aznsista2envy@xanga - they do, pretty sure this was the poster who just put on datingish her list of how to be the other woman. so they are cheating, just with her, not on her.
which i believe is where a lot of these things come from. not really all older men like this, but older men who are in a stagnant relationship of their own and meet a hot young girl who likes them will whip out the prince charming "romantic, payer, pursuer" thing even though they haven't done it for their wife in years because that is half of the fun of  the affair is doing something completely not real life for them.
but there are a few points I agree with: having a good conversation, maturity, and stability which are all huge positives.
but some reasons to go for younger men
#1 They get it. They get your insecurity and silliness and immaturity maybe they don't like it, but they understand it and don't write you off for it. so you can be how you feel and not have to put on an act to appear glamorous and good enough for a man who is much more mature than you just to get his approval.
#2 They take you seriously. So many times if an older guy likes a younger girl it is because she is his "breath of fresh air" his little sex kitten, the one who takes his mind off of his grown up life. But the minute you have feelings or thoughts that are important and deserve their respect but don't fit the "cute little girl" mold they have put you in they shut you down as immature and decide you are being childish and they don't need to listen to it. They only want to listen to you when you are making them laugh or telling them how unutterably wise they are. Whereas a younger man will take you seriously. They understand that you are on an equal level and when you have thoughts and feelings whether they like them or not they understand that they matter.
#3 You have got forever. Yes, we can all die tomorrow. But older men's clocks begin ticking at 40--life's halfway point. And whether you plan to be with them for the next forty years or not you have to take heart disease and cancer and all of the other sickness that start hitting a lot more seriously because the chances increase more everyday. Young guys, they are where you are, chances are you don't worry about health, you probably should, but you won't because chances aren't that high, so all you have to do is embrace life!
#4 Younger men have way more energy. You don't have to be an athlete to appreciate this. Whether it is a late night donut run to walmart or a second round of sex in the morning--old guys just won't be up for it while younger men probably will.
#5 They don't lecture. There comes a time in a man's life where he quite "confidently" believes he knows everything. It is usually around middle age. Because of this they like to share their experience all the time, especially to their innocent, naive young girl friend. I get enjoying the wisdom, but who really likes listening to an old wind bag impart biased, prejudiced, personal opinions like they are the dalai-freakin'-lama? Young guys rarely do this.
Honestly, I think you should look around at guys your own age. Since you said you are on taken guy number 4 or something (if that was you) I really doubt you are being respected in the way that you deserve. A lot of young guys are obnoxious in all of the ways you listed, and all of them are undoubtedly immature. But there are outliers and exceptions. Find one who can treat you right.
I always thought any girl that dates a guy who's 6+ years older than her is an insecure gold digger. You know, the girl that scoffs at the notion of a guy her age or just a little older than her asking her for a date. They look and with an aire of arrogance, laugh a little and then ignore the request.
Yet, who am I to judge what kind of guys a girl dates. For me, I like to date ladies who are between 2 years younger than me up to 4 years older than me. Its just a personal preference. I hate it when women generalize that 90% of men ages 18-24 are all immature and undateable. You just ran into the wrong crowd. There are a ton of very good guys out there who aren't always scheming of how to get into your pants on Friday night. If you're a mid-twenties female and you've always dated older guys, give the younger guys a shot...you might be impressed that you did.
don't get me wrong, i do like older men but maybe it's just me, the older men that i've dated or gotten to know are way more cocky and conceited than younger men.
@hitomineko@xanga - HAHA FOR REAL ! :o)
Interesting.
@PervyPenguin@xanga - Exactly.
@PervyPenguin@xanga - Ditto. Who okayed this to go up?
Also why is this like novel length?
@Jane - woah.. WOAH... i think u should put up a post like this XD
I like younger guys. :/
I mean, older guys are cool and all, but I like my guys with a boyish charm.
Younger guys can be romantic too, especially really young guys, like 16-17, the ones that are girl crazy. It's so cute!
My boyfriend is two years younger than me and he is LITERALLY the greatest guy in the world. Not kidding, we've only been together nine months and I'm pretty sure we're gonna get married and have babies together. Anyway, my ex was two years older than me and he was a douche. So, needless to say, I'm over older guys.