Monday, 08 March 2010
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The Go-Girl Pee Funnel Invention
What is the world coming to?
I powered my computer on and went directly to surfing the web and I came across the worst invention since the pedal powered wheelchair (this is just cruel, paraplegics would be stuck just sitting there), the inflatable dart board, the Cat Wig (Jimmy the Cat Whisperer has a closet full of these. RIP – Snowflake!) And the Anti-Eating Face Mask (Wifesense bought one of these for Walt for Christmas; it is essentially a metal face mask that makes you look like Hannibal Lector).
You know what tops the list of worst inventions ever? The Go-Girl Pee Funnel.
Got to Go Pee Jenny
It levels the playing field way too much. Guys need something to hang their hats on (no pun intended) and the one thing we always thought we could rely on is the fact that we pee standing up and girls don’t.
When I am peeing outside at a tailgate the last thing I want to do is look over and see a girl standing next to me emptying her funnel while peeping my small ass unit.
It is inconceivable. Congress needs to intervene here. This is more important than Healthcare and the failed economy.
This also gets in the way of the one thing that guys do to get even with their petty wives; leave the toilet seat up so the wives have to either sit on a cold porcelain toilet seat or fall into the toilet bowl altogether.
It is a subtle way to remind them of the male superiority. So you keep complaining about Walt not putting out the garbage? BAM !!– a splash of toilet water at 6AM will take care of that.
OH, so you keep complaining that Walt keeps leaving his clothes on top of the hamper instead of in it? KABOOM!! – enjoy sitting on a pee-pee covered porcelain toilet seat. Case closed!
You guys get the idea. We cannot let this happen. We need to hold on to the one thing that actually makes us men – peeing standing up!
Damnnn!!!!!!!!!
If we are not careful women are going to start demanding more shit from us – hell they may even get to vote in the elections someday, or even demand that ugly women get to become flight attendants. I cringe at the thought.
The Go-Girl is not considered a funnel by its maker it is considered a female urination device. What?
The Go-Girl is disposable, and comes with tissue and a biodegradable baggie all in the neat little cylinder that fits in your purse or pocket. You can buy one here for $4.99 (you can also buy a t-shirt, cap, or shorts, in case you want the world to know you like to pee standing up).
I am actually happy that it is disposable. That is ingenious. The last thing I want to see is a pee-encrusted funnel sitting in the dishwasher making all of our other dishes smell like rotten tuna and asparagus. This puts an end to that horror.
It is actually pretty cheap too. I have a feeling that women will be walking around with bulges in their crotches in no time. Is that a squirrel in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?
Hold that thought – Walt has to go empty his funnel. His penis seems to be in hibernation again. It has been a long winter, hopefully I see the little guy again soon! Bon Chance little pee-pee Bon Chance!
I may need to get me one of those t-shirts too. I love peeing standing up!
Their motto is awesome to – Don’t take life sitting down. LOL. That is awesome! You Go Girl!
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About the Author
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- From: waltsense
- Name: waltsense
- About Me: I am one sexy beast! I grew up in Philadelphia, which makes me very awesome. I have blue eyes which makes me even awesomer. I am married, which makes me less awesome but when my wife isn't looking I switch up the throw pillows on our bed and blame it on the dog (even though we don't have a dog) which makes me really awesome. I don't like people that talk or listen, they are both fake. I like to fly kites and I like unibrows and cankles. That pretty much sums me up!
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Comments (57)
Lol. I'd buy one just so I can empty my funnel against a lamp post while staring at your small ass tool.....
But women do pee standing up. Just look at those strange hole-in-the-ground toilets with showerheads next to them found in some countries which I associate with muslims. Or.... we can pee in the shower.
I don't have an opinion on it.. really. I just know I wouldn't use it.
As far as your blog though, I always thought the toilet seat argument was crazy. If a man has to put it down for us, why can't we leave it up for him? Or.. how about a woman who just pays attention to whether or not it needs to be put down first?
Jeez... I think my boyfriend and I save a lot of arguing just for the simple fact that I'm not a toilet seat Nazi. My life isn't so busy that I can't take seconds to put a seat down instead of falling into fucking toilet water... what the hell is the deal with those women?
@Laiza@xanga - actually they dont stand while peeing in those... that would be a disaster and you would end up peeing all over you pants... you squat. its a squat pot.
That seems unnecessary
BEST. THING. EVER.
I love camping, so I've been wanting one for a while. Most other models are just expensive!
I tried the SheWee, and it was terrible. After a dozen or so attempts in the shower, the urine always spilled over the side. I wanted to use it when we went backpacking, but I was stuck doin' the good ol' squat. Otherwise, I would've had pee dribble down my pants every time I used the SheWee out in the middle of nowhere, and wet pants are not conducive to hiking 8-13 miles a day through thick forests. I will have to try the Go-Girl. The large end of the funnel and the fact that it's made of silicone seems better suited for the purpose. The SheWee is hard plastic and has a very narrow opening that doesn't create a seal; if you pee more than a very small trickle, it will fill the funnel too quickly and spill out the sides.
@lejosdeaqui@xanga - I was upset that I spent over $20 on the SheWee, and it didn't even work properly.
@tykazowsky@xanga - I thought it would be rather convenient to just pull up your abaya or whatever and peeee....... it would be inconvenient if you wore pants yes.
uhm, even still.. they generally pull down to the knees and squat, lol
YES MY LIFE IS COMPLETE.
As a person who makes it a fucking epic art project or something when covering a public toilet seat in order to actually use it for toilet related business, I would buy the shit outta this. Wait...wrong toilet related objective.
Actually really helpful when camping/at a festival!
Or you can buy a p-style
http://www.luckyvitamin.com/p-27686-pstyle-female-urination-device-pink
it's for girls that camp and stuff like that. i mean, what girl likes squatting in the middle of the woods? I'm always afraid of a frog hitting my butt. :[
though, that's why I don't camp, either. :]
i wanna buy one to piss you off. :)
i think these were originally made for transexual men but i guess they made a cross over
More like walt(hasno)sense.
sometimes, peeing is the only time of the day when i even get to sit down. no one is taking away that liberty from me.
its better than squatting. honestly i never got the hang of squatting...how don't you pee all over your pants?! do you take them all the way off or what? i just don't understand...lol
I don't think I would like to use one of these.
Men can have all the fun they want peeing while standing, as long as he puts all of the seats down after. I do not like either the seat or the lid of the toilet left up. It looks better down. But I don't freak out if they leave them up. I just roll my eyes and put it down.
If I were to go camping or to a really long outdoor concert I would use one of these.
This is the most retarded post ever.
And I think this funnel thing could be useful, like when you're driving long distances out in the country where there are no gas stations to stop at. It prevents a squatting in the woods disaster. Now you can just take a leak like the guys.
@salvatruca_stalking_havok13@xanga - I totally agree with you.
i love it when men explain to me what women like myself are supposed to like and dislike, and let me know when i should hate on an invention that exists for the sole purpose of helping me and women like me with hyperbolic vagueness like "WHAT IS THE WORLD COMING TO?????"
it's coming to convenience, ya dick. don't like it? don't put ya pussy in it.
well, once in a blue moon, we may stuck in traffic for hours and hours, if a man has to pee, they can use a water bottle. But for us women, there's really not much to do and I'm not gonna pee where people see.
Actually I wonder if it works, just hook that funnel to a bottle.
A friend of mine in the peace corps uses one of those and likes it I believe. I assume it's rather handy for places with most squat toilets.
unnecessary, but hilarious!