10) Toilet SeatsToilet seats are dangerous spots. I've been told that gays poop too and there is a distinct possibility that if you take a seat on the same spot as a gay man did that the odors from his gay shit may infect you with the gay .... best to avoid public restrooms.
9) TeeVee (not sports or gun related)If something isn't dying or being hit at great velocity on the screen, there's a good chance that it's gay. And if you watch for too long, you'll also want to be a knob goblin. RUN!!
8) Unmanly ColorsUnmanly colors are all colors that aren't found in standard jungle, desert, or arctic camouflage. If it's bright, patterned, and can be used as a shade of eyeshadow it'll definitely turn you 'mo.
7) JewelryWearing more than a watch and a ring is a sure sign that you're on the path to gayness. Your ears should be untouched, and the only rings you can wear are championship rings, mob boss pinky rings, or wedding rings. Anything else is unnecessary and only indicates to the rest of the world just how gay you are (unless you're Mr.T).
6) SpeedosIf you wear a speedo and you're not an Olympic swimmer, that banana hammock will have you oozing with the gay within a matter of laps. Always where big baggy board shorts when swimming or you'll pay the price!
5) Museums and Art GalleriesThink about it ... museums and art galleries are the stomping grounds for intellectuals and the liberal elite, otherwise known as gays. This isn't the sort of propaganda you need to hear and you're almost certain to get completely covered in their gay. Avoid at all costs!
4) Jay Leno(He's driving a Penis car! I mean...come on people!)
This one's obvious. Jay's lisp is 100% gay related. If you laugh at Jay, you're already a gay man (or an aging housewife from Tulsa).
3) PiratesA bunch of dirty men .... on a boat ... at sea (sea-men?!?) ... together (huddled together) .... for months at a time? If you're into Pirates, you'll soon be joining the navy for all the wrong reasons. Avoid pirates and go with ninja's instead. Also ... butt pirates.
2) BaseballThis one is tricky. You'd think that because it's a sport that it would ward off gayness, but if you look closely you'll see it's pretty darn gay. First off, the baseball players wear pretty tight pants. No one quite knows why, because it's not like they're doing a 100m dash or something and need less wind resistance. So there's that. Secondly what happens when a baseball player scores a run? He comes to home base and get's his butt spanked by another teammate. Granted this happens in other sports, but at least in those sports the players are hitting and smashing their opponents. I mean, a baseball fight starts when the batter accidentally gets hit with balls by a pitcher. And then the whole team gets in on it! That's pretty gay. So if you watch baseball on a regular basis, watch out! It starts with baseball and then next thing you know, the base gets removed and all you have are balls ... everywhere.
1) DisneylandHappiest place on earth they call it. Well, do you know what another word for "happy" is? That's right, "gay"! So, what does the "Happiest place on earth" really mean? You guessed it, "The Gayest place on earth"!! And you're paying to be there! For shame. If you want to amuse yourself, go to a monster truck rally or shoot some animals, but for the love of god don't go to Disneyland!
(He's driving a Penis car! I mean...come on people!)
Comments (208)
Huh.
1. Hehe! Whoa.
2. That's a huge automobile Jay Leno has. How he heck is he ever going to get that in a drive way?
@AphoticxIllusion@xanga - thats what i said too. haha.
Wow... -.-
@Duhiana@xanga - Apparently I must of been near a gay toilet somewhere. Lmao. Not sure how I could miss that, though. It seems gay toilets have eyes, tongue, the works.
Hahahaha... homophobic much? =p
@AphoticxIllusion@xanga - LOL! I bet those are just 'minor' signs of recognizing a gay toilet, this post should not even be taken seriously, it's too amusing. and it seems according to number 5, being smart or interested in some artwork is considered being gay.
@LauraG0929@xanga - i was pondering the same thing.....
@Duhiana@xanga - Yeah, I thought it was funny too. I'm an artistic person. Did you know creativity has been linked in the same places of the brain where mental illness is? That's a theory about Van Goh, and how he severed off his ear. He obviously wasn't right in the head, but his paintings were amazing. Writers, too. My favorites are the Raven poem, and a lesser known power called "Root Cellar." Interesting story about the guy who wrote that poem. His father had some green houses in the back. In his time, the glass was very thin. So, he'd climb that green house, whenever he could. He fell. Broke arms. Got cut up by the glass. No matter how many times his dad punished him, he wouldn't stop climbing it.
Even as parody this is stupid.
Um okay then...wow.
lol
you missed acting.. or anything acting related because I mean common sharing emotions and even crying sometimes... sooo gay...DONT DARE WATCH MOVIES and shows!!!
and the most obvious one, dont come in contact with the gays, if they sneeze on you, you are instantly gay and there is no flu shot for that...
Btw, "A bunch of dirty men .... on a boat ... at sea (sea-men?!?) ... together (huddled together) .... for months at a time? If you're into Pirates, you'll soon be joining the navy for all the wrong reasons." = Epic and amazing, haha!
?
@AphoticxIllusion@xanga - Really? I am not really an artistic person, but I do write poems when I'm either depressed or melancholy. and whenever I write them in a happy state, they turn out crappy. I think it is interesting that you are artistic, I am bound to meet people who are artistic, the most they can do is draw stick figures or inappropriate drawings (not that I'm complaining). That is an interesting story, but it gave me goosebumps haha. I love hearing the deep meaning behind artworks, I love the stories behind whats on the surface. Like in books, you know there are some phrases/sentences that have a double meaning, or it refers to mythology. I wish i was artistic, I'm just lame.
@Duhiana@xanga - Suffering is what makes art art. A master piece is a creation of raw emotion. A sculpture, painting, mosaic. Story tellers, philosophers. Art is something that you could pass by on any given day, and just by looking at it, feel the raw emotion that it was born from. True art is happiness, sadness, anger, jealousy, confusion, despair. When reading a dark story, you get chills, why? Because you feel that emotion and become frightened as well. Emotion is a complex thing. The reason why your poems turn out poorly when you are happy is because you only feel happiness. There has to be a number of emotions in something in order for it to take a hold of the viewer.
@AphoticxIllusion@xanga - I agree, you are right. When I make poems, i can only make it when there are mixed of emotions swirling around my thoughts. When I am angry, hurt, jealous, enraged. You have me curious, however, what kind of art do you create? Or is it too personal? i know some people who does personal works and likes to keep it private.
Well, I've noticed that in football, the players all wear extremely tight pants and slap each other on the butt. Gay or no?
I love this post. I cracked up quite a few times. :)
@Duhiana@xanga - Sometimes I write, but I haven't been able to write lately. So I stick to putting in emotion via my layout. I'm very in sync with my character. In fact, I build my entire site around the character I use, including the site name. I don't believe in putting myself into the character, because that would be a lie. Even though the task can be difficult at times, I always do my best to pull out the truth of the character, and display it in a way where others may see it. I find it difficult to role play with other people who have role played characters I have in the past. The reason being: I see them putting themselves into this character, instead of doing the character justice. You wouldn't watch a movie where the actor/actress distorted the character's personality would you? I know I wouldn't. Lately, I've been drawing inspiration from AMV's on youtube, to assist the viewer in picking up on the emotion. Sometimes people just don't pay much attention. In using AMV's on youtube, it's even more difficult. I have to not only pull out what the character is feeling, I have to include other characters, and the creators point of view on the video. That's pretty draining sometimes. I had another one up earlier. It took me weeks to figure it out. There was so much going on in it. I've always stated I would never make layouts for money. Ironically, one of my dad's business partners leaned over my shoulder and asked if I would work for him. He does some sort of financial sites.
You are a satirical genius. On the same level as Oscar Wilde.
@AphoticxIllusion@xanga - I think people who write rather than type up their thoughts gives more meaning to their words. I don't know if that made sense or not, I apologize if it didn't. My cousin writes very beautifully, but when she blogs, I just don't see the same feeling that she put towards writing. It seems you are very passionate on putting forth the emotions and your character, however, i noticed sometimes people struggle when writing what they need to say, is it not frustrating for you too? like you said, it is pretty "draining sometimes" and it took you weeks. But you do seem to have that passion towards it, I'd honestly just give up unless I am really deep in sync with it.
Sorry for my spelling errors, I am really tired today :)
i hope this is just some sick joke. i really do. homophobic idiots are the worst people i have ever met. though i respect your beliefs and opinions, i honestly believe this is going too far and is just plan stupid.
how the hell did this get onto mancouch? sure it's something some guys would find interesting, but i mean, in my experience, mancouch has been a place where posts concern ALL guys, not just a few. hot girls i'm pretty sure all guys are in to (except homosexual ones, but then they wouldn't subscribe to mancouch anyway). bashing on homosexuals? not so much.
even if it's satire or parody, i find this to be really stupid and unnecessary.
I was in Disneyland on Gay Day!!!!!!!!!!!!
wow... how long did this stupidity take you?
this post is gay hahahha