Monday, 16 November 2009
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Ask A Hot Chick: The Fake Orgasm
(Source)
Sometimes I can totally tell when my girl is faking it. Why does she fake it? What’s the point?~ Anonymous
Darling, you are not alone with this. Psychologist John M. Grohol did a survey that showed that 67% of women admitted to faking an orgasm. Many women simply cannot achieve an orgasm during intercourse. Orgasms feel so good because they involve so many systems in the body; neurological, anatomical, muscular, hormonal, respiratory and the list goes on. If just one of these systems is off, well then the orgasm won’t be achieved.
Now as we all know, women can be a little crazy so more often than not it is her neurological system that is out of whack and preventing her from having an orgasm. The slightest thing could throw her off and prevent her from orgasming. Like her friend’s boyfriend bought her flowers “just because,” but she realized you’ve never given her flowers “just because,” there’s dust on the nightstand and she can’t think of anything except cleaning it off, or she has a presentation at work that she is nervous about. Your girl could be faking it to make you think she is finished in hopes that you will soon finish too. If you orgasm, then she can get on with doing whatever it is she has on her mind. The little things tend to take over a woman’s mind, things that men can tune out the moment they see a pair of boobs. Men think with their dick or their mind, women always think with their mind.
Your girl’s mind might be elsewhere or she might just not be in the mood that night, but she knows you are. She has sex with you because she loves you and she wants to make you happy… or she wants you to stop nagging her for sex. Having sex with you for a few minutes is a lot easier than dealing with your nagging.
I wouldn’t recommend talking to her about it. I’m pretty sure if you do, you will end up pissing her off. It is also very likely she won’t admit to faking it either. Some things are just better to leave as they are. Just remember, you are not alone with this and a lot of women fake it. It is very likely her decision to fake it is because something is on her mind and not that you are bad in the sack.
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Comments (67)
And besides, if a guy can't tell you're faking it, it makes him really happy and boosts his ego by faking it multiple times... Guys are so cute.
i'm a muffmucher, apparently.
So...would a guy prefer that we not fake it if we know that they can't always do it for us anyway? That would just cause you guys to feel inadequate...which you often are, but lucky for you, we're not always mean enough to tell you that.
i wont deny it..
Ah yes, thats a fix for this. "Keep lying to men!" .... To all you women out there-- understand that nothing will get any better in bed unless you *tell* them, so they can fix it.
I love this mentality which seems to be all-too-rampant among women. We ARE NOT mind readers, so if we're not doing something just right, its not going to miraculously fix itself without any input from you.
I for one would be much more hurt if I was being lied to. I would rather my girl tell me she "has a headache" or some other kind of BS I know means she's not in the mood, than have her go through the motions, falsely inflating my ego.
Is the telling truth really that scary?
My two cents. Figured there needs to be another man on this mancouch.
Give a woman a real orgasm and she won't have to fake it fucktards.
And yes. If you can't give a girl an orgasm you are bad in the sack.
End.
Faking an orgasm is good for no one. If what your man's doing isn't good enough to yield an orgasm, you shouldn't fake it, because he might think that was a genuine O and do the same thing again, leaving you unsatisfied again. Tell him that's not working, show him what works, and you'll both be happy in the end.
@of_such_a_prodigious_paradox@xanga - no i totally agree, and i'm a woman too. i'd fake it ONCE in a while with my bf, when i knew i wasnt going to come no matter what he did, and i don't want him to feel like its his fault.... but, i know its bad and i typically communicate if i think there's something he can do differently. sometimes its just, i enjoy the way its going and don't feel the NEEd to orgasm..... idk, i think girls are just different than men in that sense. however, the advice given way understates the importance of COMMUNICATION in your sex life!!! even i know i need to get better with that!
@ShimmerBodyCream@xanga - true that!
Having to fake it sucks and while I agree that maybe the mind wasn't in the right place, sometimes it's him! And the fake orgasm is the quickest way to get him the hell off -no pun- lol.
Can we have a blog on telling men how to tell if it is fake? This would cure so many problems, and kill the sex life of so many lying bitches, it would be great. Disgust me to think that women have to lie to be able to continue a sad sex life.
Come on people, just be honest, get yourself someone better or bed..or make him work harder, DO SOMETHING! If its you, then its your fault, if its him, make him feel like less of a man, and he will either pussy out and stop trying, or try harder and do whatever it takes for your pleasure.
As for me...well, I won't boast myself, thats just stupid. Come on guys, be observant during sex for once, you may find out shes been lying through her bottom lips.
Honestly, I think if I guy really wants to make a woman orgasm all he has to do is ask her. You just simply ask her what works, what she prefers, what she likes, and keep asking. You do those things and keep on doing them until she does orgasm. Also, intercourse after a woman orgasm is REALLY awesome. You can make her orgasm with intercourse, fore play, or whatever makes her excited. Once a woman orgasm it's like anything goes (trying not to generalize, but not anything). Next time try this, do everything in your power to make her cum and you'll reap some great rewards.
Trust me guys, it's freaking worth it. Don't forget, the Lord gave you ten fingers, a hand, a mouth, lips, and a tongue too. You don't have to go down under if you don't like, but nipple stimulation helps too. Also, touching is also a must. Caress her back and her legs. Kiss her arms and her neck. The ear lobes are also a great way to stimulate her. God gave women sensors all over, but guys have it in just one place: between the legs. Haha!
i think one of the main differences between men and women is that sexually speaking, women are far more complex than men. and not just complex, but far more varied in their complexity.
i think it's cool :)
@Steve Young - Oh, and if you can't tell if she's faking then you're not communicating well enough. It's not just about moaning and groaning. When she experiences a great orgasm she'll go silent and then go numb. One thing I "feel" for is the orgasm shake. When she lets it go, then you know you've done a great job. Plus, with a little experience you can kind of tell just from the normal bodily consequence of an orgasm (i.e. extra body fluids).
Great to know that some men understand!
yeah sorry dudes-you want to get a girl off? Do it during foreplay. Your hand and your tongue can do a better job then your tool
@LlothoftheDrow@xanga - agreed.
i've faked it before and it wasn't me, it was him.
@ShimmerBodyCream@xanga - Gotta agree with you. I never fake it. If I didn't get off, then sorry buddy, you just weren't doing it for me.
@I_am_Sango@xanga - That's exactly my philosophy too! You'd just be setting up a vicious cycle.
I never fail to give my ladies an orgasm. You'd know if she's having and if she's faking. Her whole insides are throbbing and cramping if she's having one, and you can feel the tremors on your penis if you're still inside her.
@LlothoftheDrow@xanga - mmhmmm :) right on.
I have faked it before...I mean a lot of you guys are saying ' come on tell us the truth. theres no point its just hurting yourselves.' women dont think like that. we think about your egos first and we care about you and we think faking it will be better then telling you the truth...which really isn't.
but also, when you guys want sex, you guys nag...and nag..and complain until we give it up. And when we have to give it up theres no chance we will cum...you have seduce a womens mind before you can do anything to her body. And if our minds are thinking about when its gonna be over...not gonna happen. I guess if you guys wanted sex and preferred we just laid there lifeless with no response to you what so ever...i wouldnt have a problem with that.
Alot of you are associating faking it with a girl who wants to have sex and just cant achieve orgasm..uh no. most of us fake it when we are really not in the mood and are 'forced' to have sex.
@sexncookies@xanga - i SO agree! do NOT nag and nag and nag and then expect us to to get off when we weren't even in the mood in the first place!
Turn on our minds first, and body second, or else I guarantee you its not gonna happen. she's just gonna want you to get off her, and the fastest way to do that is to fake it!
@sexncookies@xanga - Haha, I agree with everything you said.