This is a photograph of me urinating on something. I have the bladder of a 95 year old woman.
Hi, I'm Rizzo. Actually, my name is Joe. I have also been referred to as "The Golden Bear", "Jewbacca", and "Samuel L. Jackson". Say anything about a button factory and I will rip your balls off and feed them to your grandmother.
I have been brought on to the Mancouch team to do a little blogging, so that's just what I've been doing. Neil asked me to put together a little "get to know me" post, so here goes.
I am 23 years old and have really, really sweet facial hair. I need a real job, so if any of you want to hook me up that would be fucking awesome.
I am a three time defending champion in the awkward Superbowl that takes place in South Dakota every President's Day. My interests include partying naked, long walks on the beach, and licking people's toes when they're not looking. I can't stand the Yankees, the letter "W", or people who mispronounce the word "spaghetti".
I spend my days sleeping until noon, writing long hate-filled letters to the Hamburglar, and arbitrarily rating things on
a blog I run with my best friend.
My goals for my time here on Mancouch are to make you all laugh, get famous, and make tons of money. I probably will succeed in none of the three goals, but it won't be from lack of trying. I am looking forward to getting to know all of you, especially the ladies.
Especially the ladies.
Call me.
-Rizzo
This is a photograph of me urinating on something. I have the bladder of a 95 year old woman.
Comments (21)
I was hoping for a small, snarky Muppet and was disappointed.
Hai Jewbacca.
shave the beard, move to Alberta, and I can get you a job... oh, but if you're not open to any of those ideas, i can't help you :P
LMAO hi :)
Question Joe, why does your Xanga look like that of a preteen girls? Very curious, very serious.
I like to party.
@StephanieDFung -
hahaha, not to be mean to Jewbacca, but that was my impression too!
Lol his site is pretty colourful. That's awesome.
one day, my boss came to me and said "joe... are you busy?" i said no.
he said turn the button with your left hand......
:P good thing i'm a girl and don't have balls.
fucking Hamburglar...
i was unaware that there were actually people out there who mispronounce spaghetti, besides maybe fake toddlers...i think the rugrats did that to be cute.
hi, i'm catie, and my goals are the same.This entry was encouraging.
Before it, the total amount of testosterone owned by the entire ManCouch author block was equivalent to that of Minnie Mouse.
Try not to become a tool. Nobody likes a conformist.
@Magniloquentia@xanga - I don't like conformists either, but I also don't like non-conformists that try so hard to not conform they end up conforming to another group, the "I try way hard with my non-conformist ways" group. Yep.
you mean "pasghetti"?
Even en elementary school, I yelled at the kids who said "basketti"
I cracked up at the part about the button factory...hehehe...
And I used to mispronounce spaghetti, "basghetti". Now I just do it to annoy my mom, "spag-hetti".
@cornyonacob@xanga - Hehe! You beat me to it!
Nice to meet you! I enjoy your posts quite a bit, keep it up!
@imTHEmeowMIXcat@xanga - lol. thanks, hun C:
www.thiswebsiteisunderrated.com is it illegal to plug that website on this one? I hope this doesn't get you fired.
Nice meeting you!
you can't say call me and not leave your number, duh.