Wednesday, 07 October 2009

• Male Confessions

  
  

  We wanted to bring you a picture of a Fleshlight, but in our search for just the right one we found this HERE. It's called the fleshjack. It's stunning.
  

  
  

  Plain and simple...I'm a guy and I have confessions to make:

  1. If you're a woman and you start talking to me, expect me to look at your boobs for about 3 seconds and back to your eyes. I can't help it...it's very difficult to NOT do.
  

  2. You ever get the feeling that you're being watched? Sometimes that may be true. If you're an attractive woman and/or is wearing attention-seeking clothing, I will visually undress you until mine eyes are satisfied.
  

  3. If you look at me and I smile, it's because I believe you're looking at me because you find me sexually attractive (which is probably not the case).
  

  4. I am 19 and I currently own 3 Fleshlights™ (male sex toy) and do not feel ashamed because both women I've had sex with have commented that it's the longest they've ever had.
  

  5. It's a sad story, but I really don't want to hear you talk about how you were sexually molested by your uncle when you were 7 years old after I've already had sex with you.
  

  6. When I was a virgin, I used to think I was going to be this completely changed guy and that I wouldn't get boners in public. What can I say? I guess I'm just gifted to procreate.
  

  7. A couple years ago, I met a girl in North Carolina and instantly became sexually attracted to her. I met her at my family's reunion. She is my cousin. FML
  

  8. I'm 215 pounds and a mixture of fat, husky, and muscle, but the first thing that I do when I'm home alone is sing on Rock Band 2. I encourage my band mates to especially choose female singer songs, and I almost always let my temporary online band hear me sing.
  

  9. At one point, I actually did like Mountain Dew until rumors went around saying M.D. ruined sperm count. Now I drink Pepsi OR Coke. Mountain Dew tastes nasty now.
  

  10. I'm a meatatarian, and I still respect vegetarians and their choices.
  

  11. My first concert was Backstreet Boys.
  

  12. The first time I had sex, I did actually ask the stereotypical first time questions such as "is it in?", "do you want it in the butt?" and "on a scale of 1 to 10, how good was I?"
  

  13. I shave every couple days, I take a shower everyday, I comb my hair, I put on cologne, I use deodorant, but I only brush my teeth up to two times a week.
  

  14. I actually want kids...just not right now.
  

  15. I've been online blogging since I was 14 years old.
  

  16. I enjoy watching commercials (especially ones like Geico, Mastercard, etc)
  

  17. Every time I see the commercial where the dude sees the little girl trying to find her dog, he goes through his friends and finally finds the dog. When he gives her the dog, I almost shed a tear each time.
  

  18. I have never been in a fight before, but someday I'd love to get my ass kicked in UFC.
  

  19. If you're a woman and you're walking down the street and you hear someone go by screaming "HEY BABY" or honking their horn, it was probably me...or my dad.
  

  20. I played baseball for a couple years, I've played soccer for about 8 or 9, but I only lasted about 10 minutes of football practice before I decided to quit.

  What are your confessions?

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