Greek statues have raised the self esteem of men around the world. Guys always feel better after a trip to the museum, as Greek statues make us all look good.
I always wondered why Greek statues had such small packages...
It's ok to show naked things if it's ancient art.
I just assumed that it was a national characteristic of all Greeks (I'd like to take this opportunity to apologize to my friend Niko). Anyway now that I'm writing for Mancouch, I had an excuse to Google my way to the truth. Here is an
expert on the subject:
From [the] vast array of XXX-rated artwork we can make a few deductions about Greek aesthetic preferences, genitaliawise (here I mainly follow Kenneth Dover's landmark study Greek Homosexuality, 1978):
(1) Long, thick penises were considered--at least in the highbrow view-- grotesque, comic, or both and were usually found on fertility gods, half-animal critters such as satyrs, ugly old men, and barbarians. A circumcised penis was particularly gross.
(2) The ideal penis was small, thin, and covered with a long, tapered foreskin. Dover thinks the immature male's equipment was especially admired, which may account not only for the small size but the scarcity of body hair in classical art. A passage from Aristophanes sums up the most desirable masculine features: "a gleaming chest, bright skin, broad shoulders, tiny tongue, strong buttocks, and a little prick."
This is like a Bizarro world... big is small, and small is big. It's strangely fascinating, until you get to the stuff where it's encouraged to molest young kids. In any case, mystery solved: Greek statues have small packages because that's the way they liked it back then.
Did anyone else just think that Greek guys were cursed in the package department?
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Comments (49)
Nah, it's not really how large your package is, it's based on your experience level and if you know how to use it. Haha.
i always wondered that too , good te know XD
LOL! i have always wondered this. never seemed appropriate to bring it up in art history. =p
some people have what i consider a perverse obsession with prepubescent girls. (japanese porn, anyone?) it's interesting to see that it existed in the past with boys. just as perturbing, though.
Interesting...I always wondered that too.
I just always thought it was because they didn't want people to focus on their genitals, but rather the rest of their physique. You know, that they were so exposed to sexuality and open about it that they didn't feel the need to focus on it. But I guess I was wrong.
"I AM ZEUS! FEAR ME AND MY TINY PECKER!"
- Kunoichi
@FallenReign@xanga - No you were right. the artist made the genitals smaller so they wouldn't attract attention, but the statue would still be complete. This post was just a load of bullshit.
But circumcised is particularly gross
Unnatural.
I always thought they were too small...
I always just assumed they were growers instead of show-ers.
And whats there to get excited about if you're holding a weird position for hours on end with an old man inspecting your body from a distance?
Yup, the Greeks had these "symposiums", which were basically late-night, drunk parties for males and prostitutes only. Homosexuality and what we now call statutory rape was not condoned at all.
LMAO.
I have wondered that as well.
@John_of_the_bloomdocks@xanga - I agree with you as well. And FallenReign.
I thought they were just compensating for something.
i just assumed it was beyond gravity since the clay may be too heavy to make their package any bigger and let it hang down or out. nice to know i was wrong. :)
Hahaha. When I took art history in my freshman year, some girl blurted out "Why are all their penises small?" It was quite amusing at the time. :P
It just makes me wonder how society has done a complete 180 in terms of how we "like" our penises.
@KrazeeKunoichi009@xanga - lmao.
I find it even funnier that bigger women were revered back then over tiny sticks that the masses worship today.
Since those packages aren't even big enough to play with, maybe that explains why a lot of those statues don't even have arms.
Thats what I was thinking when I visited the Lourvre
who the hell wants a small d**k on their man? that's rediculous.
and ive never even seen a uncircumsized penis, okay well once .. and it startled me because it was unlike anything i had seen before, i prefer circumsized ..
strange how people have changed.
@abilene_piper_lg@xanga - thats not true for everyone ( cause every girl is differant ). i know in my opinion fingers and a tounge only go so far then the girl wants the real thing. and its prooven its not the length that brings pleasure its the width :). now if you have decent length to go along with that width then you are a-okaaayyy. :D
haha
@MissPixieGlitter@xanga - you know i did always want to ask my history teacher when she showed us stuff like this too. but like you said, a little inappropiate! lol!
@randompearls@xanga - you have a point. it doesn't make me hard to stand in a helmet and hold a spear for hours