Wednesday, 10 June 2009

  • Why Do We Go to the Gym



    This summer, as I do every summer, I signed up with a local gym. I plan on frequenting the gym five times a week, lifting weights Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays and doing cardio on Tuesdays and Thursdays. The question I keep asking myself though is, "Why do I go to the gym?"

    I thought up of a list of possible answers, just to see if any of them are valid reasons for why I bother to hit the weights.

    1. I care about my health
    2. I care about my appearance
    3. I think improving my physique will improve my chances of getting laid
    4. I want to improve my stamina in the bedroom (assuming I accomplish number 3)
    5. I have nothing better to do with my time

    Reason one is completely false; I drink alcohol, I smoke cigarettes and if I actually was getting laid, I'd be having promiscuous sex.
    Reason two is totally true; I am a shallow jerk who is quick to mock my fat colleagues about their guts which extend so far out, it is questionable as to whether or not they can still see their penises. I want to improve my physical appearance so I can torment even more people, sending them crying to their shrinks (yes, I am going to Hell, no need to remind me).
    Reason three is true and false; I THINK by improving my physique I will get laid more often. However, after having slaved away at the gym in the past, I find that the difference in appearance is rather negligible and will not get me more ladies.
    Reason four is true; I do want to have more energy when having sex, though as I said before, going to the gym doesn't increase the likelihood of me getting laid.
    Reason 5 I am unsure of; perhaps there are more productive or enjoyable things for me to do, but sadly, in my shallow perspective, I fail to see such things as I am too busy checking out the busty woman who just walked by me.

    So yes, I shall go to the gym this summer, get stronger and faster, look a little better. Will it make me feel better about myself? Not really, since I prolly won't obtain the type of workout I and every male really want.

    What about the rest of you lazy weaklings? Do you go to the gym? Do you feel like you go because you want to, will get something out of it, or just go cuz it is expected of you by society? I invite all people both strong and girlyman to comment.

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