This post was written by a female contributor to Mancouch.It shouldn't be a surprise really that females are sexual beings. Some may even venture to say, highly sexual beings... almost as sexual as men. *gasp*
(Ed's note: it very hard to find a non-pron picture that illustrates sexual empowerment!) Yea, that's right, girls (of course not all girls) can think about and talk about sex just as much and with as great detail as men. But of course, we all know females can't go around openly expressing their sexuality without being called a whore/slut/some permutation of the sort. So a few points I'd like to make before any misjudging or mislabeling takes place.
There is a difference between a
sexually empowered female and a
slut. The former is someone who is just naturally a more sexual girl and has the strength and courage to embrace that side of her, express it as she sees fits, and does not fear whatever backlash she receives from society. She is able to break the chains of propriety, rules of society created by men to control women. She lives her life her way, and I am truly envious of these women.
Then you have the slut. These women may also be naturally more sexually inclined, but what differs them from the sexually empowered female is that they use their sexuality as a tool because they lack other skills. They are the insecure women who feed off the attention of the opposite sex as their only means of determining their self worth. These women are dependent and weak and are slowing the progression of women as a whole. So before you go labeling someone a derogatory term, take a look at the character and personality of that person and what her motivations are for doing what she does.
One more point: guys, don't think you all get off so easy. Girls know who is a manwhore and who is not. And if you're going to chase whatever ass you can get your hands on, good luck getting a girl with any substance. Cuz girls with standards like guys with standards too. That being said, one starts to wonder, well what about the sexually inclined guy? Does he not have it tough? Being bound, like women, by the rules of a more conservative society? Sure, you have it tough, but not as bad as the sexually inclined female. Why? Because in general (sure there are exceptions), the rate limiting step for dudes is actually
catching the girl. They have to actively get the water out of the well.
Girls? The option is almost always presented to us, and we constantly have to be the one to say no. And it might just be my personal opinion, but damming a river is much harder than getting pulling a bucket out of a well. So for the sexually inclined female who chooses, for whatever reason, to not follow every whim and fulfill every urge... well,
she deserves a lot more credit than she gets.
Mancouch asks: What do you think?
True
Comments (31)
I understand the point of this post and it's great because all the points made here are pretty true. I wish women were not always so put down when they try to be sexually empowered. I just want to add something though. I dont know if I agree to the use of the term "slut" because it's thrown around so casually that even sexually confident and empowered women are thrown under the "slut" umbrella. Like what exactly is a slut? Anyways, great post...Im really curious to see what men have to say about this.
So you're saying women who are as sexual as men are normal?!
I'm not touching this post with a ten foot pole haha.
i like sex a lot. i choose to have a lot of it with my boyfriend.
@john@xanga - I second that.
@john@xanga - @TransportPhenomena@xanga - I have a feeling many men won't! lol
I choose not to recognize terms like "sexually empowered" or "slut" and "manwhore." They're used by people who base their usage of those labels on the sole criteria that a certain person has more sex than they do, and they're some sort of standard for everyone.
"OMG he/she/it/rabbit sleeps with more people than I do, SLUT!"
Please.
I would venture to say women are moer sexual than men if anything. We're sexual, men are just whores :P.
Also, men don't actually go into detail when talking about sex with their friends. Guys for the most part just say whether or not they did someone. Girls, however, go into detail, get very descriptive, and talk about what they did and how it made us feel. lol
@RazorBladeParade@xanga - i suppose you can argue against labels altogether; they tend to be poorly substantiated. however, i think the OP isn't judging anyone based on the frequency of sexual behavior. she's addressing what motivates that behavior, and while there's no universal paradigm of acceptable sexual practices, using sex because you've got nothing better means you probably suck (no pun intended =p).
i get that there is a difference. Like megan fox, shes a sexually empowered woman but not a slut :)
my girlfriend is more sexual than me. It's nice ^^
IF you want non-pornographic pics of sexually empowered females, look for Peaches.
@desertrose2890@xanga - I personally think the wordslut is used like females aren't supposed to act like guys, but it's as complicated and hurtful on the surface as calling a black man a "n*gga". I don't care if a girl is having sex with whom she wants (as long as you aren't really taking it like an accomplishment). But if a girl prides herself in hurting men with her sexuality and her empowerment or acts as if she never knew how to hypnotize a man into loving or having feelings for her, then the name starts flying.
There isnt really anything wrong with a woman doing what she feels, as long as she knows the consequences, not just sexually, but emotionally, too. Afer all, there is more to sex than the movements and the ecstasy in between.
Eh.
@mynameisblueskye@xanga - LOL
@MiSS__NARA@xanga - Serious, Peaches is a dynamo at sexual empowerment for all females.
Sexually empowered females?
Giggity.
@MissPixieGlitter@xanga - I don't know, I still don't think judging the acceptableness of motives is anymore correct. Though we may not personally like to be around people who use sex when they have nothing better to do, I don't think it makes them less of a person. Just less capable of finding something better to do.
@RazorBladeParade@xanga - lol, i meant having "nothing better" as in using sex as a tool because they need affirmation/attention and can't get it by any other means (i.e., character). the manipulation is what i dislike. having sex when one has nothing better to do is a form of recreation, and that's all dandy. :)
Sex is amazing. I've always been curious about sex, so I guess I'm kind of sexually inclined, but shy about it. Now that I have a long term boyfriend I am not shy about it with him. Yey! There's nothing wrong with sex, as long as it's safe, and you're not cheating on anyone or trying to hurt someone with it, or trying to prove your worth something.
Errm call me old-fashioned but I don't see it lady-like if they openly express themselves like that to everyone. I mean at least talk about it to people who are comfortable with it, close friends for instance.Â
Haha. I talk about sex all the time, in great detail, but generally not in front of a bunch of guys... unless I don't see myself ever sleeping with any of them & none of them have any relation whatsoever to the guy I'm talking about. Though I have to say, if a guy asks me a question related to something sexual, say, porn, or masturbation... I have no problem openly admitting that yes I do watch porn, yes I do masturbate, yes I am a normal person with a healthy sexual appetite. *shrugs* And I have to agree, slut for me is a derrogatory term somewhat akin to a hard N. It dennotes ignorance, a lack of self respect, and a general disregard for her own self worth and the men & other women she may be hurting in the process.
ahaha proven by alcohol consumption
@mayanao@xanga - "ladylike" is a concept created by men to control women. So unless you have the same expectations of men, it is unfair to expect such repression from women. In general, people are inherently sexual beings - it's only society that decides how appropriate is a given level of expression.