Saturday, 02 May 2009

  • The Right Way to a Sex Music Playlist


    Now, normally I would never divulge information like this about myself on my journal that I've had for a few years now, because well, it's just very personal stuff.

    However, I read a post on Mancouch today about a Sex Music Playlist, and after reading some of the replies, I chuckled to myself because well, these guys come off as the typical "Me man. Me want to put my penis in you" type of guys.

    Like I mentioned in my post, the problem with most guys today is that they have this neanderthal view of women, especially in college, and they just use sex as an excuse to put a tally mark on their belt and say that "they did it" back in the day.

    So here is my list of 34 songs I would use. The object of the 34 song list is to make it LAST that long. That's right guys, if you are going to use this technique, you must have patience, and a few hours.

    I PROMISE YOU, if you do this the right way, she will fall for you and never want to let you go. Keeping this in mind, this is only for girls who you are serious with.

    This isn't something you do with any girl. She has to mean something to you, and this is something you do to show you are a gentleman and that you are interested in more than just sex.

    Phase 1: Invite her over for dinner, and YOU MAKE THE DINNER

    Yes men, you need to learn how to cook, at least the basics. Go with something Italian like pasta and a balsamic salad. Light, healthy, and dinner by candlelight never goes wrong. Talk about her day, and HER ONLY. Only talk about yourself if she asks you. You want to make her interested. Always keep constant eye contact, staring into her pupils. It shows dramatic interest, and if you fold your hands in front of you and use the correct body language, she might even bite her lower lip. This would be an indication to move to phase 2.

    Phase 2: The Materials

    These are items that you are going to need in order to make this work. If you aren't the kinky type, or like experimenting, stop reading now. You aren't ready for this. The reason I say this is because you need to show you are extremely comfortable with your sexuality and exploring other areas besides sticking your penis in a vagina. If you can make a girl orgasm without using your fingers or penis, then you are using this method correctly. The object of this specific sequence is to make her so incredibly aroused she can't take it anymore. Anyway, the materials list:

    -Sleeping eye cover

    -Fuzzy handcuffs

    -About 50 candles. Varying in size, and even scents if you wish

    -Whipped cream

    -Strawberries/ Good quality Godiva type chocolates

    -IPOD player with IPOD and appropriate playlist with decent bass ( You need to put the bass at max; why, because you can communicate through vibrations and tones just as you can through speech)

    -Incense burning stick. Put this on the other side of the room. You don't want the smoke to become bothersome, you want it to enhance the experience. Don't use some indian scents like musk. You want something flowery and light.

    -Red felt-tipped (washable) marker

    -Feather

    -Warmed nighttime lavender baby oil

    Start by telling her to trust you. Do not take off her clothes. Blind fold her, then handcuff her with her hands above her head. Tell her to relax, slow her breathing, and enjoy. This is where you start the music.

    Phase 3: The Playlist

    Here is my list. You can arrange it anyway you like. However, remember, the goal is to make this last the length of the play list. You must however, keep the last 5 songs in correct order. These songs are what I call the intimate phase. There are no words to these last five(except for the first song), and they really enhance the sexual experience.

    1. Augustana - Angels

    2. Brand New - Play Crack the Sky

    3. Bullet - Paul's Song

    4. City & Colour - Like Knives

    5. Coldplay - The Scientist

    6. Concept Zero - 3 Words

    7. Counting Crows - Round Here

    8. Daphne Loves Derby - Tennis Court Soundtrack

    9. Daphne Loves Derby - Pollen and Salt

    10. Daphe Loves Derby - Sun

    11. Dashboard Confessional - So Impossible

    12. Dashboard Confessional - Hand Down (acoustic)

    13. Dashboard Confessional - Remember to Breathe

    14. Dave Matthews Band - Crash Into Me

    15. Dave Melillo - Sam's Song

    16. David Grey - This Years Love

    17. Death Cab for Cutie - I Will Follow You Into the Dark

    18. Dispatch - The General

    19. Edwin McCain - I'll Be

    20. Elliot Yamin - Wait for You

    21. Evan and Jaron - Crazy for this Girl

    22. Ryan Cabrera - True

    23. The Fray - Vienna

    24. Frou Frou - Let Go

    25. Goo Goo Dolls - Name

    26. Good Goo Dolls - Iris (acoustic)

    27. Straylight Run - For the Best

    28. John Mayer - City Love

    29. Lifehouse - You and Me

    30. IMOGEN HEAP - JUST FOR NOW

    31. LUDOVICO EINAUDI - Le ONDE

    32. LUDOVICO EINAUDI - UNA MATTINA

    33. HANZ ZIMMER - MAESTRO

    34. ORBITAL - HALCYON & ON & ON (GREAT WAY TO FINISH.... Listen and you'll see why)

    Phase 4: The Sensations

    Start the music.

    Start by blowing in her ear. Laying down next to her. Only use your middle finger to touch the tips of her face. By that I mean her nose, lips, and ear lobes, then work your way down the neck. Get close enough with your face that she can feel the heat radiating off your body, but don't kiss her you want to touch her as least as possible, while exciting her sensory system throughout. Proceed to take the feather, and do the same thing, except this time work from her toes up. Repeat as necessary.

    Slide her shirt over her head so it's in line over the handcuffs. Don't take it off all the way. Her bra should be exposed, but don't take it off. Take the red felt marker, and proceed to write on her body. Things like hearts, I love you, even secrets. The object of this is to make her think about what you are writing. Make it obvious, but don't tell her what you are writing. You are NOT ALLOWED TO TALK FOR THIS ENTIRE SESSION! That's the point. Take away as many senses as possible and slowly let her regain them to enhance her stimulation. Sorry, I'm a psychology major, I kinda take a hint to this stuff. Repeat as necessary.  

    Rest a small strawberry/chocolate (Good, Godiva type chocolate you cheapskate!) on her upper lip. Let her be able to smell it. Don't let her eat it just yet. Blow in her ear. Lick the outside of her ear while dragging the feather in circles on her stomach up to her neck. Then let her eat the dessert. Slowly. Repeat as necessary.

    Use the whipped cream to draw hearts on her body. Lick them off appropriately. Repeat as necessary.

    Roll her over on her stomach. Sit on her butt. Slowly drip the warmed lavender baby oil on her back, rubbing it in using a kneading motion. Learn how to give a good massage or you are going to screw this up. This is important. It gets her totally relaxed. This should last at least 40 minutes. Slide her pants off so her panties are showing. Massage the backs of her legs, and work down to her toes, work up and down her arms, neck, etc.

    Roll her back over on her back. Repeat with whipped cream, except down below the belly button this time. If she lets you slide her panties off, continue to use the whipped cream in the appropriate area, but only using your tongue. Don't go inside her or use your fingers. The point is to make her extremely aroused.

    Drag the feather over her whole body now. Unhook her bra, use the feather around her breasts. Repeat with whipped cream, etc. Get creative.

    Roll her on her stomach again. Take one of the candles, and slowly drip some of the melted wax on her back. After each drop, wipe it off with a wet handtowel and kiss the area slowly. A little bit of pain followed by a sexual sensation such as a kiss, always makes things interesting.

    Now, I won't continue, because well, the rest is trade secret. However, use your imagination. If she wants to have sex, save it for the last 5 songs. With this method, you can bet that she'll want to keep you around for awhile.

    Cheers.

    Do you have a sex music playlist?  What do you listen to when you're getting it on?


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