Friday, 10 April 2009
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Trying to Get With A Mature, Older Woman
Today I found myself checking out a female's left hand... to see if there were any rings on it. This is a totally new practice to me!
I'm all for checking out the cleavage, maybe a subtle glance at the derriere. But the left hand?! This is virgin territory.
I didn't even realize that women had left hands I fancied... until I caught myself staring down at her ring finger and feeling a well of relief that it was bare.
"Shit, what am I doing?! Shit! What if she sees me!? Shit! She'll know I have an intention to marry her if she catches me inspecting her hands for wedding rings! SHIT SHIT SHIT!" were my immediate thoughts, so I quickly looked away and prayed that nobody had seen my embarrassing moment of interest.
I guess I've never checked for wedding rings before because, well, I've never been all that attracted to ...A WOMAN IN HER THIRTIES!
She had to be around 35. Possibly older. Scandalous, I know.
Yes yes yes, I know there are some outstandingly beautiful women in their 30's, and 40's, and even older. I'm thinking the Jennifer Anistons, Angelina Jolies and Kylie Minogues of the world, even the criminally fit women who works at the Deli on my street. But I've never checked any of these women out with a serious intent toward dating one of them. Something to do with the fact that they are years out of my league! And it had never occurred to me that I could do such things, until this very moment.
And as strange as it might sound, it's kind of assumed in the UK that people in their twenties are not married (yes, I know some are, but not many!) marriage is something that happens to old people in their thirties and forties. At least, that's always been assumed by me, so "Is she married!?" is never a question I've found myself asking about a hot 20-something lady! Realizing this was an older woman I instinctively looked for a wedding ring. Is that strange?!
I'm under no apprehensions that this older lady spies me as anything more than the intern kid. And I can't fancy a woman in her thirties, because I have so very little in common with a sophisticated and accomplished woman of the world! Yes, yo, she's not some cute girl in her twenties that I can innocently flirt with and charm with my juvenile knowledge and quirks. She's an actual woman! That terrifies me beyond belief.
Anyway, this afternoon, she asked everyone at the news desk: "Anyone going to see Frost/Nixon tonight? Everybody mumbled a no. So she looked straight at me, and I shook my head (probably blushing bright red!) and appeared disinterested, because I was incredibly scared that if I dared admit how much I badly want to see that movie (as a young British dude, I'm very much looking forward to seeing a movie about a young British dude who kicks some American presidential butt!) then she might ask to platonically come along, and I'd suddently find myself on a friendly date with a thirty-something woman!
And people would stare at us and think "Look at that poor kid! He thinks he's on a date! But that woman has no interest whatsoever. What a poor deluded mite!" or even the inexplicable "Shit, is that his mother!?"
And I'd freak out because in comparison to her I'd suddenly appear such an impish child with nothing interesting to say and no refinement whatsoever, that I might as well die right there on the spot. I'd be way out of my depth, even just out on a friendly date!
Sad, but true. I do need to grow a pair, or three.
So, we have come to the conclusion that I am not ready to date a 35-year-old. (I'm 23, by the way!) Heck, I'm probably not ready to date anyone.
How old is too old for you to date? Do older, more mature women intimidate you?
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Comments (14)
I know I'm pretty intimidating at 5'5" and looking like i'm 14, but apparently not enough because I have a younger boyfriend.
As long as they're not taller than me, I pretty lax on the age.
Older women are the best, they are least likely to be golddiggers, they are less bitchy and are mature. An older woman is up front if she likes you she tells you younger women well girls around my age 17, 18, 19 tend to play stupid mind games and all that immature crap. I'm 18 and heck I think I would date a 30 year old woman once she's good looking and has a good personality but I doubt I will date someone 15 years or more older than me. Older women are kind of intimidating but if you are not insecure their age shouldn't make a difference plus if you yourself act mature people might not even notice the age gap.
i don't think age is ever an issue w/ dating just as long as both think alike. some men younger than i am have a mind of a 30-year old (i'm 24 by the way) and some 30-year old men think like their 15. so i guess it all depends w/ how mature and ready a person is to be in a relationship.Â
As a 22 year old, anything over 40 is just too old, but I also fancy older men. I find that I can communicate and relate to them as to some dumbsh*ts around my age. But I also gauge their personality and body language to make sure they're sincere.
I'm 21, and I think my dating range is 20-25, max! anything over is just weird for me!
I like older men.
But five-eight years, max. I'm 25 and my beau's 31. WOOT!
I'm 15 and the guy has to be over two years older than me. But I tend to be more mature than most kids my age, which kinda sucks. I've been waiting for college to be more in my zone, although apparently I'd have to wait to be a senior, anyways. Damn me for skipping the whole "stereotypical teenager" stage. I don't fit in as well and my friends look to me as an adult. Ahh.
I have two single women living with me. One is 96 and the other 93. interested?
since males tend to mature later than females *no offense*, i prefer older..but seem to attract the young ones. hmm.
;P
hmm.... im 18 and ive been hit on my 30+ year olds. and always assumed to be 16 by 20+ year old guys yet they still give it a good try to get me to date them oldest ive dated was 5 years older than me. :)
@tigerclaw27@xanga - You hit the nail on the head! We're also more open sexually and not afraid to say what we like. Downside is...okay, there is no downside.
NOWAY should you date a older women.
My fiance used to date a older woman when he was 18. And he learnt the hard way that even tho they might be more mature when younger girls. They are also WAY better liars too.
I have met the "woman" he dated and within 10 minutes of being around her i noticed that she wasn't a "woman" at all but just a teenage at heart. Older woman who date younger guys are just trying to get bak in touch with their youth and lik with my fiance she was just using him to make her ex bf jealous.
I think you should stick to ppl around our own age.
I think it's a problem when all the older women are looking for men their age but find that they are already married with children. So they tend to go for younger men because they are free and available with no ties.