The Five People You'd Like To Sleep With

Friday, 10 April 2009

The Five People You'd Like To Sleep With

A man is sitting in front of the telly watching nothing in particular on a Saturday afternoon when his wife comes through the front door after having her weekly lunch meet-up with her girlfriends.
She's obviously had a pretty good time because she's all smiles and giggles and proceeds to update her largely disinterested husband on all the mundane conversation that passes across the ladies' meal.
One thing in particular catches his ear, though: "Darling, have you ever played the list game?"
He thinks to himself (ooh, a game, sounds like fun; could this involve sport?) "I don't think so, hun. What is it?"
She giggles to herself some more, "Well, it's all just silly really but you basically choose five people who, even though you're married and in a loving relationship, you are allowed to sleep with."
The man's eyes suddenly brighten up, "Seriously!? Interesting..."
She's still giggling, "Do you wanna hear my list? Do ya!?" Without waiting for an answer she starts reeling off all the usual Hollywood names: George Clooney, Brad Pitt, Johnny Depp; etc.
The husband laughs at her, "Wow, you've gone for some pretty big names there but I think that due to the fact you're probably never going to get a chance with any of them, I guess I'll let you have that list."
A smile beams across her face and she laughs with him, "So... you should make a list too. Go on it's fun. Oh go on. Remember, it can be absolutely anyone."
He thinks for a few seconds, "Done."
She looks confused, "What? Already? That was quick. Maybe you should take some time to think about it."
He smiles, "Nope, all done."
A little taken aback, the wife inquires, "Okay then, who's on your list?"
The husband starts reeling off his list and his wife's face drops as she realizes what she's done to herself...
"Let's see: your sister, the pretty one; my secretary; the girl next door; the child minder and your mother, but that's more for novelty value than anything."
The moral of the story is: When playing games, make sure you explain the rules fully and properly or you're going to get your ass kicked!
Do you have a list of people you would let your SO sleep with? Are they celebrities or people you know ?
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Comments (38)

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Mine would have to be:

1.) Kelly Brook

2.) Kate Beckinsale

3.) Cheryl Tweedy

4.) Jeniffer Aniston

5.) Megan Fox

Hell yeah! ;D
- 4/10/2009 1:49 PM
- TheL0ki@xanga (message)
- reply
yo mama
- 4/10/2009 1:59 PM
- Pcgecko85@xanga (message)
- reply
HAHAHA, sad stuff
- 4/10/2009 2:04 PM
- jesuismir@xanga (message)
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Nope. Just us.
j/k.
I honestly can't think of any actors I'd like to sleep with. I'm happy with my sex life anyway. Sure he's got one or two. Meh.
- 4/10/2009 2:16 PM
- DarkButtercup94@xanga (message)
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he'd sleep with pretty much any asian, & any hott chick he sees.
i'm not like that at all. i don't go around & go "oh, i'd do him." or whatever. i don't have a list. altho jared leto is my future gorgeous man (hah.), i wouldn't sleep with him.
- 4/10/2009 2:20 PM
- EmergencySurveys@xanga (message)
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yes, he can sleep with me, my vagina, my left boob, my right boob. & my heart.
gosh i'm corny, but myself, my vagina, left boob, right boob, & heart all have a mind of our own.
- 4/10/2009 2:33 PM
- asdfghjkieu@xanga (message)
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Geez, that's sad. And it started out all cute with him telling her she could have her list. Then he had to go be a jerk and mention everyone he'd sleep with but her....
- 4/10/2009 2:49 PM
- Lynnjynh9315@xanga (message)
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i'd never have celebrities on my list. they're honestly not that desirable. my list would have ppl i know.
as for my SO, the list better say my name on it five times. i disagree with the moral. SOMEONE's ass is going to get kicked, and it's not going to be mine. i tend to think way outside the box and if the rules of the game are not laid out properly, what happens is i win all the time.
- 4/10/2009 3:07 PM
- jolee121910@xanga (message)
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@asdfghjkieu@xanga - hahahah.

I LIKE.
- 4/10/2009 3:29 PM
- immaairheadxl@xanga (message)
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I composed my list:

1. Leonardo Dicaprio

2. Morrissey

3. Dave Gahan

4. Rusell Brand

5. David Beckham

He loves Alyssa Milano and Shannon Elizabeth and Christina Aguilera and if he sleeps with Christina, he can't come back to me, you know because of STDs.
- 4/10/2009 3:34 PM
- WhenHateIsTheOnlyOption@xanga (message)
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I'll trade David Beckham for Prince Harry. I got a thing for that lil' redheaded f*cker.
- 4/10/2009 3:37 PM
- WhenHateIsTheOnlyOption@xanga (message)
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I didn't come to answer the question. I just came to say that was some funny stuff right there. The real moral is if you don't want to know the answer, don't ask the question.
- 4/10/2009 3:57 PM
- mynameisblueskye@xanga (message)
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@Lynnjynh9315@xanga - Well, at least the guy was being realistic.
- 4/10/2009 4:01 PM
- mynameisblueskye@xanga (message)
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i don't have that list, my last SO did. people who lived in her dorm, and she'd ogle over them while with me. that got old pretty fast.
- 4/10/2009 4:14 PM
- jebdereb14@xanga (message)
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Let's see....
Barbara Walters, Margret Thatcher, Joan of Arc, Helen of Troy, and Helen Keller.
In other words, no.
- 4/10/2009 4:24 PM
- thecommonfate@xanga (message)
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haha i saw that coming...great moral! :)

My list:

1) Patrick Dempsey

2) Shemar Moore

3) Patrick Dempsey again...

4) Shemar Moore again...

and 5) that blonde Fox News guy from Florida

:)
- 4/10/2009 4:30 PM
- Peridot21@xanga (message)
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@mynameisblueskye@xanga - Seconded. And that's pretty much women in a nutshell, lol.

Can I be a staff writer now? Kthx.
- 4/10/2009 5:03 PM
- Kazydai (message)
- reply
I dont have a SO but I kinda made a list up a while back of my top 3, 4 and 5 were added off the top of my head.
(1) Brooke Burke
(2) Live Tyler
(3) Jennifer Connelly
(4) Reese Witherspoon
(5) Kate Winslet
- 4/10/2009 6:00 PM
- Doubledb@xanga (message)
- reply
umm...that is a hard one. ok, I'll mutually agree to a foursome with jessica simpson & jennifer tilly's boobs, so 3 against 1, fair enough;)
- 4/10/2009 6:37 PM
- alice
- reply
@WhenHateIsTheOnlyOption@xanga -

haha, whenever I think of Russel Brand I'm reminded of his one-step seduction plan.

"HMMMmmm?"

I guess it works. ;P
- 4/10/2009 7:09 PM
- C0ll33Ncorps@xanga (message)
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lol we have the celeb lists, but that's all. and it's all in jest anyhow :P
- 4/10/2009 7:58 PM
- BeautifulAnorexic@xanga (message)
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You, you, you, you, and you.
- 4/10/2009 8:32 PM
- wired_cynic@xanga (message)
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Actually, now that I think about it, I pick:

1) Lacey Chabert2) Alésia Glidewell3) That one girl in my old psych class.4) Blue Sky5) My girlfriend
In no particular order.
By the way, I'm totally joking. Totally.
- 4/10/2009 9:04 PM
- Kazydai (message)
- reply
Hahaha. I know this story.
Mine would be:
1.) Sophia Bush (She's beautiful; I'd actually marry her. lol.)
2.) Leighton Meester
3.) Channing Tatum
4.) Milo Ventimiglia
5.) Penelope Cruz
So if I were seeing someone and I tell him about my list, he'd most likely think I were lesbian since the number of the women on the list is more than the men. But, I'm not.
It's just that if I were a boy, I would. lol.
- 4/10/2009 11:39 PM
- intensely_passionate@xanga (message)
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Im not in a relationship right now, but I wouldn't care if my girl had some list of who she would have sex with if she could. I sure do. Let's see here... in no particular order... Tila Tequila, Kim Stolz, Kate Bekinsale, Jen Biesty, Angelina Jolie, Dani Campbell, Allison Hannigan, Lena Katina, Jamie Lauren, Anna Paquin...

Thats more then 5 isn't it? Oops. =P
- 4/11/2009 12:12 AM
- sugarcoatedstacie@xanga (message)
- reply