Tuesday, 31 March 2009

• My Friend's Dad Smoked My Marijuana!

  
  
  

  
  Once upon a time during a smoking session at my friend’s house, his dad walked in just as I was exhaling a fat rip off the bong.
  
  Of course upon seeing him walk in, I choked like a little bitch.  No matter how hard I tried, it's a bit difficult to stop a plume of smoke from coming out of your mouth if you're hacking your lungs out.  I quickly put the bong down at my feet to try and hide it, but it was too late.  He saw everything, and walked straight for us.  You could see the fire in his eyes, I knew we were in for it...I was about to catch an ahjusshi (Korean old man) beat down.
  
  He walked right up to the coffee table, where we had conveniently placed an oz. (Ounce) of the finest greens you could get (13 years ago) and he snatched the baggie.  Inside the baggie was 2 joints and 1 blunt that just been rolled by yours truly.
  
  --"Whose is this?” he demanded.
  
  I was too stoned and scared to answer.
  
  --"Whose is this??!", shaking the baggie furiously in front of his sons face.
  Still quiet.
  
  Finally he gave up on the interrogation.  He either realized we weren't going to rat each other out, or that we were in fact too stoned and paranoid to talk.
  
  **For those of you who don't know, an oz. is quite a bit of marijuana.  In a sandwich bag, if you put the tips of 3 fingers (index, middle, and ring) together from your left and right hand, you have what roughly measures about an oz. of marijuana.  If you have skinny fingers, then 4**
  
  Anyway, after giving up on the interrogation he promptly walked in to the restroom where I assumed he was going to flush our dank down the toilet, some good marijuana never to be seen again... what a waste.
  
  I heard the door latch as he locked himself in the restroom.  After a bit of quiet time, I spoke.
  
  --"Dude, your dad is going to flush away our shit."  I said with despair.
  --"Yeah I know, but wouldn't it be funny if he smoked it", he giggled.  Still obviously high.
  --"Dude, you're so high, he's not going to smoke it.  Obviously he's going to flush it all down the toilet".  I said.
  --"Oh yeah?  Then why hasn't he come out of the bathroom yet?"
  
  In my stoney haze I hadn't noticed, but it had been a good half hour since his dad went into the bathroom.  It was 30 minutes going on 40 now.
  
  --"Holy shit dude, your dad is smoking the fucking marijuana!"  I gasped.
  --*Giggles* "Yeah man".
  
  We both giggled like freaking Beevis and Butthead for like another 20 minutes when he finally came out of the bathroom.  He lumbered out and made a B-line straight for the bedroom.  By this time our high was wearing off and we took this opportunity to break out of the apartment before his father came to his senses.  We didn't leave before doing a quick inspection of the bathroom.  Sure enough, we detected faint traces of the missing ganja.  We dug around the restroom for a bit in an attempt to reclaim our stolen goods but to no avail.  Not even an empty baggie, which led us to the conclusion that he still had it on him.
  
  In the end, we never found the marijuana, nor did his father ever bring up taking it from us.  I saw him again the next day and it was as if the whole episode was some strange shit faced hallucination that never happened.  I guess it was an even trade...giving up a bag of herb to not get your ass kicked by your friends dad.
  
  Have you ever been caught smoking or doing any drugs?  Have you ever caught your parents? 
  
  
  

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