If you ever get pulled over or stopped by a car, do not say the following things to them.
1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer.
2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.
3. Aren't you that guy from the Village People?
4. Hey, you must have been doin' at least 120 mph to keep up with me...Good job!
5. Excuse me...is stick up hyphenated?
6. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a cop.
7. I almost decided to be a cop, but I decided to finish high school instead.
8. Bad cop! No donut!
9. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?
10. Gee, that gut sure doesn't inspire confidence.
11. Didn't I see you get your ass kicked on COPS?
12. Wow, you look just like the guy in the picture on my girlfriend's nightstand.
13. Is it true that people become cops because they're too dumb to work at McDonald's?
14. So, uh, you on the take, or what?
15. Gee, Officer...that's terrific...the last officer only gave me a warning too!
16. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.
17. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other cars around-that's how far ahead of me they are.
18. What do you mean, "Have I been drinking?" You're the trained specialist.
19. Well, when I reached down to pick up my bag of crack, my gun fell off my lap and got lodged between the brake pedal and the gas pedal, forcing me to speed out of control.
20. Hey, is that a 9 mm? That's nothing compared to this .44 Magnum.
What would a cop do if you said any of these things to them? What are some other things you should never say to a cop?
List is from funnylist.netmancouch.com
Comments (83)
Good one!!
Guys are pathetic.
Wow. Lol.
Do you know how many times I've been pulled over and gotten away with it? AHAH
"HAVE A NICE NIGHT, LADIES"
HAHAHAH 19
lols @ #7
hahahaha those were great
i loved 17
@the_loveliest_tragedy@xanga - please elaborate on your comment...
@C_UNIT42@xanga - elaborate???
This is pretty funny.
"Ociffer, I swear I'm not toxinficated!" (My friend to a cop after leaving a wedding.)
"I smell bacon!" (My son at the age of four to a cop who pulled me over for speeding. I kid you not.)
I'm sure I've said some retarded things but was too messed up to remember them. I did ask a CO if it was true he only became one because he couldn't pass the test to be a REAL cop...
Bad cop, no donut! HA! Other than that, they were all pretty lame.
lol @ #7. I've asked a meter nazi if the LAPD test was too difficult before. As far as cops, I'd rather not mess with them.
wow... if I even said anything like that to the local police they'd taze me right then and there.
@the_loveliest_tragedy@xanga - Yeah, elaborate. You've said a pretty unrelated statement, and we'd like to know exactly how guys are pathetic, and what that has to do with this post.
@Dorkasaur@xanga - It has to do with this post and another post that a guy has posted about guys being just drinking, sex, television etc. On the Mancouch they don't have any meaningful blogs really just ones like these thats why I said that guys are pathetic. I was being saracastic if anything. I love a guy but I got to admit even he can be pathethic sometimes.
@the_loveliest_tragedy@xanga - These posts are meant to be funny. They're not representations of men, because most people know that men are more than sex, drinking, and sitting on couches. But since MANCOUCH is a blog geared towards men (hence the name), the humor is going to be based off of what most men find to be funny. And this isn't to say that women won't find it funny, I for one find most of the mancouch posts to be quite hilarious. Mancouch doesn't need to have meaningful blogs. These are merely for entertainment and humor. If we wanted a deeper meaning and reason, we'd read revelife or some other boring but "meaningful" blog.
@Dorkasaur@xanga - Okay then. Maybe when I said that guys are pathethic I was being sarcastic. Not saying it and really meaning it. Dry humour.
@the_loveliest_tragedy@xanga - Fair enough. Sarcasm tends to be funnier and less offensive when it's blatantly sarcasm. stating that guys are "pathetic" without any reason or other comments, on a post unrelated to men all together, doesn't really give off the sarcastic vibe. Just sayin'
This is from a really old forwarded e-mail...
HAHAHAHAHAH nicely done :D
#21. "Shoot me."
Bastard cop sent me to a psychiatric facility for that. I'm not kidding.
girls rock !
..like Dorkasaur@xanga
hahaha :))
absolutely hilarious.
=]