One of my closest friends has been going to a strip club every weekend for the past few months. At first I didn't think much of it, he has tough weeks with school and work, sothis was his way of unwinding.
But the last few weeks, he's been going on weekdays, spending hundreds of dollars there.
When I approached him about it, he said it wasn't a big deal, he was just trying to have some fun.
He seemed fine the times I went with him, but something about his denial didn't seem right. He was very defensive and he never is.
I left it alone for a few days but couldn't help wonder if he's become addicted to strippers and the whole strip scene.
A part of me still isn't sure.
Can someone really be addicted to the whole strip scene? Do you know anyone that has been addicted to the strip scene?
mancouch.com
Comments (18)
You can technically be addicted to anything; addictions aren't limited to drugs. Sounds like he's got an addiction to strippers o_o;
of course he could be addicted, and it sounds like he is. there are lots of things people could be addicted to, the possibilities are pretty much endless.
I have a friend that spends absurd amounts of money on drinking/partying, most of it at strip clubs. They are addicited to the attention. All the girls love him, all the guys want to be him... he is on cloud nine.
yep, guys can never get enough of big boobs and in your face lap dances. costly but it is one way to relieve stress.
not sure if he's addicted? he's going to the s-club when the sun is out! wtf do you think? as a friend, you should confront him and smack him across the face with a wad of 1's. because s-club addiction is pricey -- way more pricey than addictions to cigarettes or alcohol.
I can see where your friend is coming from. I'm in Japan and I've gone to a host club (the Wiki is here if you don't know what it is). It's not like a strip club, but it is just as expensive and follows a similar idea. I told myself I'd only go to the club once, because I was doing a research paper on the topic. After I went, I said I'd go again during the summer before I return to the States.
Fast forward to the present. I just made my third visit to the club this past Friday, which is already three times more than I originally planned (even that first visit was a last-minute decision). I wouldn't call that an addiction. But if someone questioned me about it, I'd probably end up sounding defensive just like your friend, even if all I'm doing is giving them a rational explanation.
Once or twice a month at the strip club is not an addiction, but when he starts going more and more often, and spends way more than he should, it's good to keep an eye on him. It's good that you've noticed and voiced your concern. You can't make him stop going, but at least try to make him more aware of his growing habit.
I believe men should not succumb to the temptation to visit such clubs. Personally, as with porno, I believe it distorts their relationships with girlfriends and wives. It can be addictive of course, and with all addictions, you pay a price. I think your friend should be encouraged to discontinue this practice and find a very nice gal to share his life with.
Men can get addicted to porn so of course they can also get addicted to strip clubs. I mean think about it. Strip clubs are like an ongoing fantasy where the women respond to you and fulfill certain requests. I would think it is better than porn.
Your friend is probably having a virtual relationship with the dancers there, which I think can be quite unhealthy if he doesn't keep things in perspective. It's wise to discourage him from going too often.
@NVRSAD_DAY@xanga - I think you are correct.
would you rather he be seeing a shrink but spending the same amount of money? It could be seen that way. This is his therapy for the things going on in his life but instead of seeing a licensed doctor he is seeing a professional dancer
@ninnatay@xanga - I actually feel very strongly about this issue. I got started with soft porn when I was 14 years old, and it took me years until i got to the point where I was never bothered by the bad thoughts. I think it is a huge mistake for guys to go to strip clubs or use porn.
Thanks for your comment.
frank
basically what your friend has is an addiction to live porn. And it is an addiction. He needs to get help, but he has to realize he has a problem. Step #1. But, continue to be a good friend to him, trying to get him to stop. Refer his to Sexaholics Anonymous. They can help him stop, but he has to want to do it, at least a small part of him does.
If it was drugs or booze, or even prostitutes he was blowing his money on... you wouldn't be asking this question. Sex addiction comes in many forms other than the act of sex itself- masturbation, porn, strippers, hookers. It all leads to the same place of uncontrollable sex seeking, loss of thousands of dollars, loss of friends, family, maybe a job, and deep depression. it is not pretty... and I am speaking from experience here, both as a recovering addict, and a sponsor.
maybe ?
Sounds like he is bored and do things that in the long term hurt him financially he should broaden himself find out what he really wants instead of escaping into such environment.
I've been there man "Not strip clubs" but addicted to much games to get away from my real goal being somewhere you don't have to , don't want to prevent you from reaching your destiny.
It depends. Is he wealthy? Is he losing friends, loved ones and putting himself into debt over it?
Then yes it could be an addiction.
It is kind of like a gambler at a casino. If you have the money and can drop a grand a month and it is doing no harm to that person or anyone else then no i would not think that is an addiction but rather a past time.
However i had a friend years ago who lost his girlfriend and home and vehicle etc.. because he was throwing away money he really did not have to the club.
It was nothing for him to drop a hundred during the lunch hour and the next thing you know by the time pay day rolled around his check was already gone. He had no money to take his girl out or pay the creditors off.
You did say he told you it is no big deal and he is just having a good time. At that point i think you should just leave it alone. It is his life not yours and his money so maybe that is why he was defensive. LOL
I'm sure someone could.
part 1 of the question maybe
part 2 of the question no
I go to a strip club on a fairly regular basis. Actually, there are two clubs I frequent, one upscale and one OK. I spend approximately $100 each time I go. See, I don't drink alcohol, so I have two Cokes each place and that's it.
What's the appeal? After a while it's not about seeing naked women. The novelty wears off quickly. Lapdances are fun but they're unfulfilling. No, I go primarily so I can sit and talk to gorgeous, interesting young women. I've met college students, paramedics, dental assistants, and a LOT of single mothers. Sure, there are some with obvious substance issues, but most are just women who are making a LOT of money for doing very little work. And they seem to have a good time doing it.
I've made friends with some of the girls. I've dated dancers and waitresses from the club. And I've had a blast doing it.