You live in California when ...
1. You make over $250,000 and you still can't afford to buy a house.
2. The high school quarterback calls a time-out to answer his cell phone.
3. The fastest part of your commute is going down your driveway.
4. You know how to eat an artichoke.
5. You drive to your neighborhood block party.
6. Someone asks you how far away something is; you tell them how long it will take to get there rather than how many miles away it is.
You live in New York when...
1. You say "the city" and expect everyone to know you mean Manhattan.
2. You have never been to the Statue of Liberty.
3. You can get into a 4-hour argument about how to get from Columbus Circle to Battery Park, but can't find Wisconsin on a map.
4. You think Central Park is "nature."
5. You believe that being able to swear at people in their own language makes you multilingual.
6. You've worn out a car horn.
7. You think eye contact is an act of aggression.
You live in Alaska when . . .
1. You only have four spices: salt, pepper, ketchup and Tabasco.
2. Halloween costumes fit over parkas.
3. You have more than one recipe for moose.
4. Sexy lingerie is anything flannel with less than eight buttons.
5. The four seasons are: winter, still winter, almost winter, and construction.
You live in the Deep South when . . .
1. You get a movie and bait in the same store.
2. "Ya'll" is singular and "all ya'll" is plural.
3. After fifteen years you still hear, "You ain't from 'round here, are ya?"
4. "He needed killin'" is a valid defense.
5. Everyone has 2 first names.
You live in Colorado when . . .
1. You carry your $3,000 mountain bike atop your $500 car.
2. You tell your husband to pick up Granola on his way home, and he stops at the Day Care Center.
3. A pass does not involve a football or dating.
4. The top of your head is bald, but you still have a ponytail.
You live in the Midwest when . . .
1. You've never met any celebrities, but the mayor knows your name.
2. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor.
3. You have had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" on the same day.
4. You end sentences with a preposition: "Where's my coat at?"
5. When asked how your trip was to any exotic place, you say, "It was different! "
You live in Florida when...
1. You eat dinner at 3:15 in the afternoon.
2. All purchases include a coupon of some kind -- even houses and cars.
3. Everyone can recommend an excellent dermatologist.
4. Road construction never ends anywhere in the state.
5. Cars in front of you are often driven by headless people.
Do you hail from any of those places? Are any of the lines true about the respective parts of the country?
list is from funnylists
Comments (97)
New York is so true.
I'm kind of hoping someone does a Maryland / Baltimore / DC area list XD Out of curiosity what they say about us!
Nope, my state isn't on here.
I died at the ones about those New Yorkers. They're awful neighbors.
hahah
the first one for cali. True. True.
CALI AND TEXAS represent ;)
You can pretty much combine the deep south and the midwest. I'm from TX and all of them are true for us.
Oh man, the Midwest is nailed. The deep south was pretty good, too.
The part about the midwest and not having met celebrities...they have to pass through on their way from one coast to the other, and I don't even know who my mayor is. and we don't always say it was different after returning from vacation.
The other two are true though. :)
HAhahaha funnaaay. I liked them all up to the Deep South.
And veddy veddy true about how yall is singular and all yall is plural.Hahaha. It is!!!
I love the ones about New York. I have a friend from New Jersey who still calls it "the city" and then gets exasperated when we don't realize what city she means (in Pittsburgh, we just say we're going into town).
A lot of those work for Pennsylvania as well, though. I still like the ones for specific cities the best. The Pittsburgh one is so true! I cracked up reading it.
i'm new to new york.. so i guess it hasn't applied to me yet.
I don't fit in your description at all. I'm from the"___" and have lived in "___". Guess the bill doesn't always fit.
Funny just the same.
The midwest one is true, generally.
Except for those of us in/near Chicago. :)
@jupiter312@xanga - Compared to NYC Pittsburgh is just a town.
But thank God Pittsburgh can play football better than them. If the Eagles get any worse I'm going to become a Pittsburgh fan soon.
California. I can agree with 6 for sure, and maybe 1 and 4, too. I have no clue about the others, though.
Eh, the Deep South part is too much, but the "y'all" line is 100% true!
We're a little bit more sophisticated that that
.
Why is the South the comedic punching bag of America?
@John_of_the_bloomdocks@xanga - It definitely is, and I like it like that =)
And we're definitely a big football town (most Superbowl wins of any team).
@jupiter312@xanga - I know it. Although your town has some very odd landscaping. I've never seen more bridges in one place in my life either.
It's kind of cool though, and they give you an awesome view of the stadium at night. I still wouldn't want to have to get around there every day.
I think number 6 in California should be under all of them. I'm from the Midwest and that's how we give directions!
@Dark_Midnight_Rider@xanga - Neither does the bikini, LOL! Sorry, I couldn't resist! I'm usually not like that.
@John_of_the_bloomdocks@xanga - I was born there and I still can't navigate it. It's very poorly laid out. And there's a bridge every other street!
This post was funny and so true. I lived ten years in Maryland and have driven in Baltimore and DC several times! I can give you a few things: You live in Maryland when . . .
1. Two old geezers pace along side each other so no one else can pass.
2. People drive 70 mph in a 35 mph zone.
3. You have Maryland Stuffed Ham for breakfast.
That's it; I'm not very good at this and it's getting late. See what you can come up with.
You know you live in NJ when somebody you know gets pulled over for doing over 80 mph in a 25 zone at least once every 3 months.
i'm from the midwest and i relate more to the cali and new york ones (except for the one about the a/c and the heat - dead on). Â and the top part of missouri (which is where i live) is nothing like the "deep south" so whoever said that is wrong.Â
*laughs! love it
-t