What Should A Women Do When A Man Cries?

Monday, 12 January 2009

What Should A Women Do When A Man Cries?
QOTD

After our last post, how a man should react when a woman cries, we had a few ladies who were interested to know what they should do if a man cries.

So fellas, what should the ladies do when/if you cry? Girls, what have you done in the past?

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Laugh.
- 1/12/2009 12:09 PM
- nimbusthedragon@xanga (message)
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I simply hug my man and tell him that everything is going to be alright because, in the end, everything works out as it should.
- 1/12/2009 12:10 PM
- SincerelySteffanie@xanga (message)
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Ok no but seriously...... he was already pretty damned testosteronedly humiliated for crying to begin with... so I said nothing, but I held him for a while. non verbal is the way to go, I've noticed, and then pretend like it never happened, unless he wants to talk about it. Guypride is very delicate... and crying pretty much destroys it to begin with, nevermind asking "are you ok? You want me to help you find your balls?"

(Ok being sarcastic, but you know what I mean.)

......

I'M A GOOD GIRLFRIEND DAMNIT
- 1/12/2009 12:14 PM
- nimbusthedragon@xanga (message)
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punch him in the nuts .
- 1/12/2009 12:12 PM
- rediscoverbeauty@xanga (message)
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@nimbusthedragon@xanga - Not likely XD
Anyway, pretty much the same when a girl cries. They don't need to be put down or anything like some men do. You know the whole "I'm sorry but you were acting like a bitch blah blah blah."
To be honest I can't stand when men cry. Or at least the men I've dated. Pretty much gives me the whole "how dare you" attitude, especially with my past experiences.
- 1/12/2009 12:21 PM
- misswonderj@xanga (message)
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@rediscoverbeauty@xanga - That would make him cry more but nice try xD haha
- 1/12/2009 12:22 PM
- misswonderj@xanga (message)
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@nimbusthedragon@xanga - Lol, guy pride for sure is very delicate...

I kinda just hug my guy and quietly sit there with him, or try to say soothing things...

I feel like a guy's opinion on this would be really good though, cause so far it's only been girls... and guys know what they want better lol.
- 1/12/2009 12:50 PM
- SerenaDante@xanga (message)
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Tell him .. that makes two of us. ( Implying that he is more of a woman than i am (jk)...but then again, he probably thinks I'm implying that i'll voluntarily cry with him). If I encounter a man that cries.....then you will know. I wouldn' t know what to do if it was a man or a woman.
I mean i don't want to upset them(make them cry even more) but i do want to cheer them up.....hummmmmmmmmmmmmm
<3 <3 <3 Molly Molly Molly
- 1/12/2009 12:54 PM
- MollyLocketSkin@xanga (message)
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I cry with him! I bawl because I cannot stand when boys cry. It's just so unusual and when it happens, it's shocking!

But I hold him and just lay there and cry too. Not hysterically, but the tears will fall.
- 1/12/2009 1:08 PM
- apatheticbyte@xanga (message)
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I do not know what to do, i kinda just sit there and wait for it to pass....
- 1/12/2009 1:17 PM
- Whoneedsnorml@xanga (message)
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the last thing i would do is make him feel stupid for it.
- 1/12/2009 1:47 PM
- destined_dear@xanga (message)
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i think it is one of the defining points of a relationship once your man can cry in front of you... like others have said, i kind of just sit silently & listen to whatever he has to say, & i also cry too sometimes, it is just such a pure emotion when men cry, i really think it's beautiful.
- 1/12/2009 1:50 PM
- citymadeofASHES@xanga (message)
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That's when I put on my magical blind glasses and pretend I can't see anything around me. If we're close, then I'll offer some sort of physical affection, but I will absolutely never speak of the tears, either at that moment, or ever again, unless he specifically wants to talk about it.
- 1/12/2009 1:55 PM
- la_faerie_joyeuse@xanga (message)
- reply
Hmm wow, what should a woman do...well the last time I cried in front of a girl was when I was with a recently broken up ex a couple years back. We both just sorta cried together, holding each other. *shrugs* not sure what else to do but just let it all out and hope it ends soon.
This is a very very rare occurrence for most guys, so I guess if I were to do that again I would prefer that the girl does not stare. Kinda embarrassing, no? No laughing or punching in the balls please!
p.s. Um, am I the only guy who has responded so far? haha.
- 1/12/2009 2:18 PM
- Roadlesstaken@xanga (message)
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The last time I cried in front of a woman was in 2001 when my high school sweetheart and I broke up. I felt absolutely pathetic and vowed to myself never to do it again. Since then I haven't cried in front of a women at all. The couple of times I may have cried it was by myself and usually because some kid somewhere is suffering or something like that.I don't like kids suffering.
I know women say they want you to cry and be all sensitive, but the minute you do they lose all respect for you as a man.
- 1/12/2009 2:26 PM
- roxics@xanga (message)
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@roxics@xanga - Men are human, too. I wouldn't lose respect for them if they cried. But I do lose a bit of respect for them if they try too hard to "be a man" and hold all their emotions in. In my experience, that just makes them angry people.
- 1/12/2009 2:36 PM
- LadyLibellule@xanga (message)
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Say everything would be okay and things will worked out in the end, and ex-work colleague was highly unprofessional who made me upset.

I had more than my fair share of tears, being bullying because of my disability at school some days I would sooner have stopped at home - but this would have made the bullies win.
- 1/12/2009 2:46 PM
- my_final_username@xanga (message)
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@LadyLibellule@xanga - Generally I agree with you. I have no problem being sensitive, but crying is something I won't do anymore. When you touch the stove and get burned, it's hard to touch the stove again and believe anything other then getting burned.
- 1/12/2009 2:58 PM
- roxics@xanga (message)
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@LadyLibellule@xanga - I totally agree with you. I wouldn't lose respect to a man if he cries, a man can be emotional and sensitive just like a woman and it's hard for them to constantly put with "not crying". I say a man goes through a harder process. when it comes down to... overcoming an obstacle. That's just my opinion.
- 1/12/2009 3:01 PM
- glimpseh2o@xanga (message)
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@roxics@xanga - I kind of have to agree, actually; you hear stuff all the time about how girls wish their guys would be emotional and be willing to cry in front of them. Then the next thing you know you're hearing some girl chatting it up with a friend in the cafeteria line about how much of a wuss her boyfriend was the other day...
Hard to take these opinions seriously when you see people contradicting it every week, if you ask me.
Personally, I've never cried in front of a girl since maybe early junior-high; if it does happen, I prefer not to talk or anything.
All you have to do is just be there; maybe a hug or something.
- 1/12/2009 3:20 PM
- CokeIsIt@xanga (message)
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I've only ever seen him cry once and it was over me. Since I had intentionally made him cry and wanted him to suffer (b/c he had been a douchebag) I wasn't particularly up for comforting him. I just looked at him rather blankly b/c I didn't want to have him think his tears would make everything OK.

If he were to cry now however, I'd probably just hug him and not say anything at all.
- 1/12/2009 3:33 PM
- di_ya@xanga (message)
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Well, my boyfriend cried to me in my car the morning of our senior prom because his parents had told him they were getting a divorce the night before..thanks a lot freaking a**hole parents! I didn't mind him crying but i was so pissed at his parents not waiting just one more night to out with it, anyway, I just sat with him and held him and told him i'd be there for him bc my parents had just separated a few months earlier too..sucky year
- 1/12/2009 3:54 PM
- Broken_Stargazer@xanga (message)
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- 1/12/2009 4:06 PM
- Lizo
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I think you should treat them like a person who has emotions and feelings and who needs comfort above all else. Hold them and get them to breathe and maybe try to make them laugh. I don't particularly care for the stereotype/social expectation that males aren't supposed to show emotions. one of the things I love about my boyfriend is that he isn't afraid to cry.
- 1/12/2009 4:26 PM
- saphireseas@xanga (message)
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When i saw my X bf of 2 years cry when i broke up with him i felt Sooo bad, so i started crying as well, and we just held each other, eventually he pushed me away and left... it took him about 3 months to be friends with me again.
I've seen my current bf cry three times now with in 1 year. The first time because we were going to be apart for over a month... we hadn't been apart for more than 1 day up until that time. We just cried together until the morning when i had to leave. The 2nd time he cried was when he thought his grandparents were going to die and i started crying with him and we held each other once again. The 3rd time i saw him cry was when his good friend committed suicide and his other friends found his body in the yard...Sooo we both cried and i actually cried harder than he did and i barely knew the kid.But the right thing to do when a guy cries is hold him, and start crying with him : / I don't think of him as less of a man at all, i feel closer to him and know who he is better because of it. It shows that guys really DO care about things.
- 1/12/2009 4:26 PM
- LandingOnMyFace@xanga (message)
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